Thai Food in Taiwan: Lessons Learned from "The Amazing Race"

Oh my god, I can't tell you how much I loved last night's episode of The Amazing Race ("Sorry, Guys, I'm Not Happy to See You"), which had it all: snappy dialogue, breakneck pacing, underdogs pulling through to stay in the game, and a massive, massive comeuppance for one duo.

Before getting into the specifics, I do want to clarify one thing. Nate, by now I hope that you've realized the error of your ways. I don't mean your heinous mistreatment of Jen (the two of you are clearly made for each other if not meant to be together), but your complete and utter misinformation about Taiwan, which is not now nor ever will be known for its "Thai food." That would be, um, Thailand.

Jen meanwhile seems hellbent on making up her own words. This week's bon mots? "Cold- blinded." I am not entire sure what that means, to be honest.

I am definitely rooting for Ron and Christina at this point. They managed to get on that first flight to Taipei, which landed only a few minutes before the other teams but held onto their lead the entire leg and didn't once run into one of the three other remaining teams. (A rare feat in and of itself.) I thought for sure that Ron would return to his old ways and start bickering or criticizing Chris, but he kept his cool, kept his mouth shut, and the team kept their lead. I will be honest and say that I had earmarked these two for elimination during, say, the second leg of the race but they've managed to surprise me with their drive, determination, and spunk, not to mention the way that the race has healed their fractured relationship. Unlike Nate and Jen.

Speaking of which, what was up with that teary post-elimination confrontation between the two of them? We rarely ever stay on an eliminated team after their wrap-up interview but the cameras kept rolling as they admitted that their relationship was pretty much doomed from the start... before Nate picked up Jen--backpack and all--as he sobbed for their lost love. I was cheering the entire time that these fractious Racers kept falling behind the other teams, praying that they would be the ones to be eliminated this week. (Wahoo!) Not sure what the idea was with taking the subway (I get that part) and then a bus (whah?) to the Youth Park, when--even with bus lanes--a taxi would probably be a better bet. Fortunately, it was pretty much that decision that doomed them as they arrived at the park in last place.

(For the record, I totally would have chosen the Earth Detour this week; it's all mind over matter and if you just walk quickly, it couldn't have been that bad. And that Roadblock? Awesome!)

I whooped and hollered when Nick and Don managed to show up at the Pit Stop before Nate and Jen, who continued to show their true colors by complaining about the other teams. While, yes, TK and Rachel were low-key throughout this competition, I'd hardly call them lazy or say that they weren't trying. I was impressed with the way that they managed to finish their Speed Bump--a rather cool one in which they ran through a field of fireworks--and got back on track to catch up with Nick and Don and Nate and Jen. Especially as Nate and Jen were so obviously NOT pleased to see them. Ha ha, as Nelson Muntz might say.

I do think this is the first time that three underdog teams have managed to make it into the final three, a really unusual and rather interesting turn as there is no clear cut winner among the pack. I also have to say that I'd be okay with any of the three remaining teams walking away with the million dollars, but that cash would definitely be a nifty accessory to those "electric vehicles" Chris and Ron won last week. And, maybe I missed something, but did Chris manage to secure the last seats on that plane or was the flight not sold out? Color me confused.

Best line of the night: "Are you the happy guy?" - Don, to the Asian clown.

Next week on the season finale of The Amazing Race ("The Final Push"), the final three teams race to the finish line, crossing cities, wilderness, ocean, glaciers, and national park in their final leg; one warring team comes together, while another one falls apart; Nick misreads a vital clue, much to the consternation of Don. Who will win and walk away with a million-dollar prize? Find out next week.

Flower Power and Taxi Driving on "The Amazing Race"

If Ron would shut up for once, I'd gladly give him the million dollars at this point.

Some of you may be surprised by that statement, given the fact that I've bemoaned abrasive father Ron's treatment of Christina during this season of The Amazing Race, but at the end of the day they're the only team I'd really be happy with winning at this point, now that Goths Kynt and Vyxsin are out of the race.

On this week's episode of The Amazing Race ("I Just Hope He Doesn't Croak On Us"), Ron did try his damned not to be overbearing, which brought the contestants to Osaka, Japan, and to support saintly daughter Christina as they raced their way to a first place finish. While Ron does find it impossible not to say anything (just take a look at the way he harped on the taxi driver dropping them off away from the airline terminal entrance for an example), I was impressed this week with the way he stayed level-headed and optimistic for a change.

Christina was much, much better at the taxi-driving Roadblock than I thought she'd be, given her lack of driving skills, though her deficiency in that area was made up for by her Japanese language skills. I truly expected her to be caught in the serpentine streets of Osaka for quite some time while Ron had a conniption waiting for his daughter to return. Instead, she kept her cool (though she did forget the keys in the car when she got out to ask for directions) and calmly found the Post Office and made it back to JR Kanjosan Noda Station again without getting lost... which couldn't be said for Nicolas, who definitely got into the spirit of the challenge by channeling a lost native taxi driver.

How random was it, though, that the cleaning man at Noda Station handed them their clue?

I had a feeling it would be a non-elimination leg as soon as I saw that the producers were forcing last-place TK and Rachel to complete all of the challenges, despite being three hours behind the other teams, thanks to a nasty flight-related screw-up that had them leaving India first but arriving in Osaka last. Ouch. Still, they managed to complete their tasks quickly (I wrongly thought they were at least six hours behind the other teams) but will now have to hope for an equalizer AND complete their Speed Bump quickly if they have any chance at staying in the race.

Were you a little surprised that there was another non-elimination so soon on the heels of the last one? Still, it's a lesson to future contestants on TAR: always check for flights yourself. If you've got the time, find someplace that has Internet access and look at the available flights online; otherwise, check with as many ticketing agents and travel agents as possible for the best possible flight. Don't just take one guy's opinion as tacit truth, as TK and Rachel did, without checking for other flights, especially as they had several hours to do so.

Nate and Jennifer, meanwhile, found themselves bickering once again, despite the umpteenth promise that they are going to be more supportive and stop squabbling on the next leg ("Today we had first right in our hands, but we've been bickering at each other, so we need to learn our lesson and I think we're learning it the hard way"). These two simply cannot get along and their constant in-fighting and tension make me want them to "come in last" as Nate inanely predicted before being corrected by Jen. And, oh, I didn't think that Nate pushed her when she was getting into the taxi at all. Can we please lighten up a little, Jen?

I thought the flower Detour was a nice iteration on the search and find challenges that have been a mainstay of The Amazing Race; this time teams had to smell out a single real flower among thousands of artificial ones in a two-story flower shop. While it looked daunting, I do think it was a faster choice than Don and Nicolas doing the robot-soccer Detour...

Funniest moment: the rewind-your-TiVo flash of Jen trying to pass a cyclist on the sidewalk, only to freeze in place, unsure of what direction to dive in. While not as outright hilarious as Shana and Jennifer reversing their car into oncoming traffic, it's a subtly funny blink and you'll miss it moment.

Next week on The Amazing Race ("Sorry, Guys, I'm Not Happy to See You"), one contestant wants a place in the final three teams for her birthday wish, one team tries to convince an airline ticketing agent not to sell tickets to another team, and one of the remaining teams becomes the target of attacks and criticism.

Oh My Goth: Witchy Powers Fail Kynt and Vyxsin on "The Amazing Race"

Sigh. I am really, really upset with how this season of The Amazing Race has shaken out on CBS.

It's not that I am unhappy with the setup this season (it's light years better than the best-forgotten Family Edition). Plus, the return of the series to CBS' strike-affected schedule has been a beacon of hope and a stark reminder that reality series needn't be trashy in order to be captivating.

So what's my problem, then? It's that I am deeply saddened that the one team I was really rooting for--Goths Kynt and Vyxsin, natch--were eliminated this week after nearly squeezing past Nate and Jennifer and staying in the game.

Argh.

Sure, they had that meltdown two weeks ago when Kynt started screaming at Vyxsin to stop the car (I did really think for a split second he was going to jump out) and said car promptly quit on them, but they managed to stay in the game, thanks to the first of only two non-elimination rounds this season.

However, this being The Amazing Race, there was a bit of a twist this season with the implementation of a new elimination-deterrent: a Speed Bump. (As Phil might say, a Speed Bump is a task that only one team needs to complete, in addition to any other tasks, and they'll have to complete it quickly to regain lost time to stay in the game.) In addition to being in last place, Kynt and Vyxsin then had this cross to bear: having to leave the competition to complete a yoga challenge that did, at least, leave them feeling centered and balanced.

I was really hoping they'd be able to lap Nate and Jen then at the flower-threading Detour, as the gruesome twosome was having such a hard time with the needlework that they once again fell into their familiar pattern of loathing one another and finding new ways to insult the other. (Nate took to insulting Jen's sewing abilities while she spit back a withering comment about his rowing skills.) Yet somehow, despite the crappy job they did with the flowers, they managed to finish first and then tried to give their flowers to an elephant. How I wished that Stampy had eaten their garland...

I still don't know why the Goths didn't Yield Nathan and Jennifer since they were basically neck and neck during the flower-threading challenge. I do wish that the producers would have found a way to let teams know who was behind them--and thus eligible for Yielding--so they can make an informed decision about who to Yield rather than choose someone ahead of them. I don't really quite understand Kynt and Vyxsin's logic about Yielding Don and Nicolas, rather than Nate and Jen; had they chosen the latter, they would definitely still be in the race.

I'm definitely sad to see them go. The dark duo really did have a great energy and attitude about the race and weren't above being sneaky in order to stay ahead. It's too bad that the Speed Bump really did put them at a disadvantage, as did the fact that their sudden lead in Mumbai was blown by the fact that the newsstand didn't open until the following morning (equalizers suck) and their taxi driver had no idea where to take them. Sigh.

As for the remaining players, I am really unsure now about who to root for. There's no way that I want shrill warring couple Nate and Jennifer to walk away a million dollars richer. I love saintly Christina but Papa Ron is so irritating that I wanted to hit him upside the head with the glue brush this week. 70-year-old Don has shown amazing fortitude during the race but grandson Nicolas irks so much that I don't really want them to win either. And, oh, I nearly forgot about low-key hippies TK and Rachel, who have proven themselves to be two of the biggest non-entities to run the race that I often don't remember they're still on the series.

Hmmm, any way that Christina and Don could split the loot? Didn't think so.

Next week on The Amazing Race ("I Just Hope He Doesn't Croak on Us"), Nicolas is forced to step up when the race leaves Don showing signs of exhaustion and physical deterioration, Nate and Jen's relationship hits a new low, and the teams must drive Japanese passengers around the congested streets of Osaka as part of a challenge.

"Amazing Race" to Race Again

If one positive programming-related development comes out of the networks' sudden and terrifying need for mass quantities of reality TV, this is it.

CBS has quickly ordered another season--the series' 13th--of reality stalwart The Amazing Race, a series many had written off after it failed to find a place earlier this year on the network's fall schedule.

The Tiffany Network had originally intended to hold Season Twelve of The Amazing Race until sometime in 2008 but, after the swift and justified guillotining of musical-drama Viva Laughlin, went ahead and gave that timeslot back to TAR.

The strategy has paid off as Amazing Race has racked up its best ratings since 2005 and CBS' decision to quickly pick it up for another season makes me believe we'll be seeing another edition of the Phil Keoghan-hosted series before the 2007-08 season is out. (According to Reality Blurred, casting on the 13th season is already complete.)

Let's just hope it's not another Family Edition or similar.

Airport Snafus, Rowboats, and Ziplines: Just Another Day on "The Amazing Race"

While I've been really enjoying this season of The Amazing Race (especially after the evil, evil blondes got cut), I am really quite curious about whether or not there will be a non-elimination leg. After all, I was convinced that this week's episode ("Cherry on Top of the Sundae That's Already Melted") would prove to be a non-elimination but I was dead wrong.

This week's installment took the teams to the stunningly beautiful city of Dubrovnik, Croatia... after a series of irritating airport-related problems that separated the teams into three clumps that removed all tension and mystery from who would be eliminated. That said, I was surprised to see Azaria and Hendekea catch up to Nicholas and Donald, who took forever on the Road Block task and allowed the sibs to nearly catch up with them (or so it seemed from some sneaky editing, anyway).

While the airport-related snafus are always a part of Amazing Race, the editors seem to telegraph them far too easily these days. As soon as one team mentioned the words "economy tickets," they were repeated endlessly, and sure enough, Azaria and Hendekea inadvertently end up with business class tickets, despite specifically asking the ticketing agent for economy class. Unfortunately for them, they realized this when they were attempting to board the plane and ended up getting on the latest possible flight into Dubrovnik. While I've been a fan of the brother and sister, this week they did grate on my nerves a little bit. Well, the aggressively overbearing Azaria did anyway; his behavior towards his sister--who was right to insist they stay in line--was bordering on the reprehensible. (“Just remember who worked his ass off. I made a bad decision. Get over it, alright?”) Sigh.

Meanwhile, the Goths were right to choose the second flight to Dubronik (selected in order to give themselves some cushion to make it to the gate on time), as the first flight--which held TK and Rachel and Nicolas and Don--landed in Prague without a connection. They ended up making it to Dubrovnik ahead of those teams and sailed into a second place finish after some idiotic mistakes by feuding couple Nathan and Jennifer. I always like how calm and collected the Goths seem and they do appear to be having fun on this race, an attitude that clearly seems to change in the scenes for the next episode. (Argh!) As long as Kynt and Vyxsin can get it together and get back to being the supportive duo that they are, I'll be happy.

As for Nathan and Jennifer, it's clear that these two have no future together; they can't even manage to row a boat through the harbor without it turning into a hateful argument in which they tell each other how much they hate the other and that they are the meanest people in the world. Still, I would have been frustrated by their inability to snag a taxi because they were slightly damp from the rowboat Detour but, then again, the directions explicitly stated that they were to travel by taxi to the pit stop. I am soooo over these two, who will clearly need to work together if they have any hopes of making it to the end.

I'm amazed at how well Ronald and Christina are doing, considering their fractured relationship. I thought for sure Ronald was going to go off on Kynt when he told him to stop asking the ticketing agent questions while she was processing their tickets (can't say I blame Kynt) but Christina managed to calm him down and defuse the situation, something I am sure she's had a lot of time to perfect. Still, despite Ronald's combative nature and his multiple injuries, they managed to swoop in for a first place finish and walked away with a 12-foot catamaran.

It was hardly surprising that Azaria and Hendekea were the last team to arrive but, as I mentioned before, I had assumed this whole time that this week would be a non-elimination leg, so I was shocked that they were ultimately cut from the race.

In two weeks on The Amazing Race ("This is Forever, Now"), Kynt and Vyxsin have an argument during a drive, one team (possibly them?) loses their clue and their way in Italy, the fast-forward makes a rare appearance with a task that involves one team making a permanent change to their bodies (ahem, tattoo, ahem) in order to get ahead, one warring team manages to work together, and Phil delivers some shocking news at the Pit Stop. Ooooh.

What's On Tonight

8 pm: How I Met Your Mother/The Big Bang Theory (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC; 8-10 pm); Everybody Hates Chris/Aliens in America (CW); I Want a Dog for Christmas, Charlie Brown (ABC); House (FOX)

9 pm: Two and a Half Men/Rules of Engagement (CBS); Girlfriends/The Game (CW); Samantha Who/Notes from the Underbelly (ABC); K-Ville (FOX)

10 pm: CSI: Miami (CBS); Journeyman (NBC); October Road (ABC)

What I'll Be Watching

10 pm: Journeyman.

On tonight's episode ("Home By Another Way"), Dan's office is hit by layoffs on Christmas Eve and he must travel back in time to save the newspaper; Katie tries to put the traumatic experiences of recent weeks behind her; Jack and Theresa receive some unexpected news; and a secret about Livia comes to light.

"The Internet Buffet": A Smorgasbord of Laughter and Recriminations on "The Amazing Race"

Oh. My. God. This was hands-down the single most hysterical episode of The Amazing Race in recent memory. I am not sure if the editors were given the brief of injecting some much needed humor (typically along the painful lines) into the show, but it has proven to be chockablock with hilarity so far this season.

What other reality series would have a contestant reverse their car into the path of an oncoming bus as Jennifer did so nonchalantly last night... and have a cameraman as savvy as theirs to pull out in order to frame a way-too-calm Jennifer, a freaking out Shana, and the behemoth of a bus bearing down on them? I also couldn't help but replay the scene of Jennifer falling off of her stilts as she screamed "No!" at the top of her lungs. Seriously. I replayed that clip about five or six times as I rolled on the floor with laughter.

On last night's installment of The Amazing Race ("We've Really Burned Bridges, For Sure"), the teams made their way to Vilnius, Lithuania after encountering an Air France ticketing agent who wins the award for being most passive aggressive and mercurial airline employee ever seen on the series to date. She seemed nice enough but I am still not sure that (A) her English was better than she let on and (B) that she seemed to be playing favorites with the teams. Sometimes seats on that early flight to Vilnius were available, sometimes they were not, sometimes ghastly flights were offered. Somehow Ron and Christina were given a later flight to Lithuania than the other teams even though they were first at the ticketing office and insisted on an earlier flight than the one this agent originally offered. It was mind-baffling to me. Then again, Ron is so completely overbearing and irritating (and his attempts to speak native languages so weird and off) that maybe it wasn't a mistake at all... As for Nick and Don, I really do think that this woman hated them as Nick was being so aggressive so bumped them from that 1:25 flight in order to give the seats to Jennifer and Nathan.

I was so glad that Shana and Jennifer got axed this week... and that it wasn't a non-elimination leg (which was my greatest fear at seeing them check in last). These two have proved to be some of the most irritating and shrill contestants since the Weavers and their constant bickering this week made me want them gone all the more. That said, they did offer up that hilarious clip of them reversing into oncoming traffic, so I will be thankful for that. It was, from my POV anyway, pretty damn sweet.

Runners-up for the Most Irritating prize this week goes to warring lovebirds Jennifer and Nathan who need to get a grip and break up as soon as this is all over. It's clear that they really can't stand one another and their relationship, already fractured before the race, doesn't seem like it can withstand any more injury. I could not believe the things that they said from one another, from Jennifer's shrill "count in your mouth" (!) comment to Nate or his calling her a bitch, or their mutual comments that this race had changed them and not for the better, which culminated in Nate saying that Jennifer's transformation was "the ugliest thing he had ever seen." Um, wow. Not sure why they leave their car to find St. Anne's Church on foot. To me, that was a moronic move of global proportions. There was no guarantee that they would remain on foot for the rest of the leg (in fact, I hoped that they'd get so turned around that they would be unable to find their car afterwards), the clue said that they had to "drive themselves" to the church, and I was praying that there would be a final locale-change before the pit stop. Sigh.

Loved this week's roadblock, in which members from each team received packages to deliver to specific people in specific places around the city's complicated network of streets. Perhaps I found it so enjoyable because the Goths did so well without trying. (Especially loved Kynt's comment to his recipient: "Enjoy your fruit and bread, dear.") Interesting too that TK managed to find the only hippie-types in the entire city of Vilnius to help him locate his quarries. Nick, of course, proved that he would blow his team's lead by wandering around the city aimlessly, unable to find the hair salon for several hours. Thus, it was pretty neck and neck to the pit stop with Nick and Donald just a hair's breadth behind Jennifer and Shana, who managed to pass them while Nick stumbled around looking for his starting point at the church.

It was brilliant to see Kynt and Vyxsin in their element at the costumed fair but I had wanted them to do better on the stilts. After encountering difficulties they switched to the counting challenge, allowing TK and Rachel to slip into first place and walk away with a ten-day vacation to Japan. Still, the Goths came in second, proving once again that they are indeed fierce competitors. Loved that Nate and Jen couldn't even get along long enough to count the pickets on the fences during a Detour and instead kept messing each other up. Still, they came in fifth place, after Christina and Ron and Azaria and Hendekea. Drat.

Thankfully, it was Shana and Jennifer who got the boot. I don't think even Phil was sad to see them go. And Shana had to say something foolish about their pampered existence outside of the race: "We come from a comfortable life. We get manicures and pedicures and facials and you come here and all of that goes out the window. I'm just amazed about what we've accomplished."

Sayonara, ladies.

Next week on The Amazing Race ("Cherry on Top of the Sundae That's Already Melted"), two teams put their relationships to the test during a white-water rafting challenge in Croatia, Nate and Jennifer's relationship hits the skids, an oversight causes problems for a strong team, and one team gets some unexpected news at the Pit Stop.

U-Turns, Chickens, and First-Place Envy on "The Amazing Race"

I'm never typically a fan of so-called "twists" in reality series, though they can shake things up from time to time. After all, The Amazing Race is a great example of a reality competition in which the rules of the game normally stay the same from season to season (except the dreaded Family Edition) and that's absolutely A-OK with me.

That said, I absolutely loved the inclusion of the U-Turn in last night's episode of Amazing Race ("Let's Name Our Chicken Phil"), a new game-defining strategy that not only lands one team in serious jeopardy but will reveal which teams need to resort to trickery in order to get ahead. In this case, when thrown into play, the U-Turn forces a chosen team to go back and complete the other half of a Detour. In the game's series of Detours, Road Blocks, and Fast Forwards (and, yes, even Intersections), it's an interesting twist that doesn't detract from the rest of the game.

I had no doubt that if any team was going to utilize the U-Turn (one of only two on the Race) this early on, it was going to be the irritating blondes. Personally, I am surprised that the producers cast another pair of blonde best friends so quickly on the heels of Dustin and Kandice, but maybe that's just me. Perhaps you're not as irked by their insensitivity, stupidity, and egotism as I am. I thought it was only fitting then that the gruesome twosome (looking all the more worse for the wear sans facials and manicures as we get on) used the U-Turn thinking that Jason and Lorena were right on their tails, instead of checking to see just who was actually right behind them. While, yes, the U-Turn is a legitimate article of play, I don't think there was any reason to use it so early in the game, much less, against the wrong team.

While the producers tried their hardest to make us think that Jason and Lorena would catch up after last week's camel-milking meltdown that took them from the lead to dead last, there was no way that they were going to do be able to complete the two Detours, the Roadblock, and make it to the Mat before Shana and Jennifer. Still, I was impressed with how cool and collected Jason was, even in the face of certain elimination, preferring to tell his partner that they'd find another way to make a million dollars, even while spewing some nonsense about how marriage would only cage their free spirits. Something to that effect, anyway.

Same too with the spiky-haired Phil's constant questioning of the contestants' chicken-carrying skills. I had hoped with the way that the editing had played up the fact that in order to check in, every team had to have their chicken with them that one team would have left it in the goat market or somewhere. Alas, no such luck. Instead, it just seemed like another attempt to add drama to an episode that was more or less a foregone conclusion.

I am surprised how well Ronald and Christina are doing, especially given his inability to shut up for any duration, his penchant for insensitive remarks about his daughter, and his hernia. Still, they've managed to surprise me by how well they've been doing thus far and might point to some hope for a meaningful relationship for these two down the road.

I'm happy that Hendekea and Azaria are still in the lead, especially after Hendekea stopped for a bathroom break while the other teams caught up. Still, they managed to quickly gain back their lead and finished in first place, just ahead of Jennifer and Nathan. Speaking of which, what the hell was up with Jennifer being angry that Azaria and Hendekea finished first again and didn't give them a chance to win this leg? Jen said something to the effect that Azaria and Hendekea had already come in first twice before and that they should really give someone else a chance. Um, honey, it's a RACE; there's so jumping ahead of the queue here. If you want to come in first place, just come in first place. Sheesh.

My faves have got to be the Goths, who once again proved that the only thing dark about them is their omnipresent eyeliner. Instead, Kynt and Vyxsin--who toned down the face paint this week a little--rocked the Shake Your Booty Detour, in which Kynt performed a whirling dervish of a sword dance, and Vyxsin appeared to be the only Racer who was really emotionally affected by their experiences in Africa, as she broke down in the cab after feeling the generosity of a people who have very little. Oh, Vyx, it's only made me root for you all the more.

Next week on The Amazing Race ("We've Really Burned Bridges, for Sure"), Shana and Jennifer discover that they have a target on their backs after using the U-Turn against now-eliminated Jason and Lorena, bicker amongst themselves, and reverse their car into the path of a speeding bus. Meanwhile, Ronald takes a fall during a challenge.

“Optimistic With a Real Truth Flavor”: Family Matters on "The Amazing Race"

Last night's episode of The Amazing Race ("I've Become the Archie Bunker of the Home") has got to be one of the funniest installments of the long-running reality franchise to date... and quite possibly showcased one of the most depressingly dysfunctional relationships ever to appear on the series (well, there's always Jonathan and Victoria, but the less said about them the better).

On that front, I'm talking specifically about father/daughter team Ronald and Christina, whose interactions had my jaw permanently clinging to the floor. I'll start by saying that Christina exhibits the patience of a saint; throughout last night's episode she managed to rein in her anger and emotions in a way that I know I wouldn't have been able to do under similar circumstances. Ronald for his part does not know how to speak to his daughter, interact with her, or encourage her. In fact, I truly think that Ronald believes that his constant nagging (along with mean-spirited recriminations and finger-pointing) IS his way of encouraging Christina, though it's quite clear to everyone around them that just the reverse is true. He also cannot stop talking, as evidenced from his involvement at the ditch vaulting roadblock, even when Christina politely told him that she needed to concentrate, or his constant whining that the bike challenge was "an ocean of things." (Um, yes, that's what these hunting challenges usually amount to.)

But I could not believe the way Ronald had a complete and utter mental breakdown at the airport and started freaking out at Nicolas after an airline counter agent supposedly made a comment that Nicolas was "rude." The way in which he started flapping his arms about and yelling at Nick about the words coming out of his mouth (“You got a mouth that basically starts with bad energy”) and how he cleaned the earwax out of his ears that morning was shocking and even more appalling than Nicolas' pushiness. The clincher, however, had to be his words to daughter Christina while they waited for the bus to the rural village of Ransdorf: “I let you loose on this thing and you basically disappointed me.”

Wow. I was amazed that Christina kept her civility. Instead of railing against her insane father, she fought back tears as she said, “You’re hard on me. Do you know that? It’s like punch after punch after punch. You really need to change that about yourself.”

On a lighter note, I really do like dating Goths Kynt and Vyxsin. I didn't think I would but they seem to be the one team that is super-competitive whilst still being remarkably supportive and understanding of each other in a way that no other team seems to be. Just look at Nathan and Jennifer if you don't believe me. I cannot wait for these two to simply self-implode and leave the Race already. Still, I had to rewind the moment about eight times when she toppled over their bike like a crazy person and then started grabbing things maniacally, after commenting rudely about Shana. Classy.

I'm liking Jason and Lorena a bit more this week though they seem to get far too stressed about glitches along the way to make me feel confident that their sudden levelheadedness isn't more than just a passing fad. (Laughed out loud at Jason's comment about the period-dressed children at the pit stop being "cute.") Still, they were the competitors to beat this leg of the race, breezing through both challenges with an ease that was exciting to see. Not so for TK and Liz, who found themselves stranded at the Hoist It Detour... that is, until Liz took over and started tying knots and hoisting those pieces of furniture herself. Tee hee.

Um, why did grandpappy Don take of his clothes for the ditch-vaulting roadblock? And why didn't Nicholas perform this task? Burning questions for me. I'm open to any and all possible theories.

Ultimately, it was married lesbian ministers Kate and Pat who were the last team to arrive at the pit stop and Phil was forced to tell them that they'd both been eliminated from the race. I'm sad to see them go, especially as they are the first religious team to admit that God has no cares about whether they win or lose TAR, had overcome several obstacles to be there in order to compete, and had both a dogged optimism as well as a little bit of a mean streak. They'll be missed, especially as several of the other teams just irk, like Shana and Jennifer complaining that they haven't had facials or manicures since they started the Race... one leg back.

Next week on The Amazing Race ("Please Lord, Give Me Milk!"), one contestant is felled by pains from a hernia and one of the older men (guess who!) falls for two female Racers; Lorena succumbs to panic at a Roadblock involving milking a camel while Jason looks on from the sidelines. Good times!

"Donkeys Have Souls Too": Another Season Begins on "Amazing Race"

Ah, how I've missed you, Amazing Race. You're like a breath of fresh air at a time when we needed you most. In a season filled with the looming threat of the writers strike, subpar reality entries (ahem, Phenomenon), and disappointing new series (save a few, really, which tend to be discussed here frequently), The Amazing Race is just what the doctor ordered.

On last night's season premiere of The Amazing Race ("Donkeys Have Souls Too"), we met the eleven teams competing for a million dollars in a race around the world. I try to not call out my favorites this early in the race as it's still a little too early to figure out just who you should be rooting for. Sod it, I'm going to do just that.

It's clear which teams I am most intrigued by. Despite their garish appearance, I kind of do like Goth couple Kynt and Vyxsin, though I had always believed that Goth culture embraced black as a primary color of clothing, rather than, you know, hot pink. Still, they work well together as a team and seem far less judgmental than some of the other teams (cough, Jennifer and Nathan, cough). Also on my TAR radar: siblings Azaria and Hendekea, who moved themselves worthy competitors as well as being sympathetic do-gooders, even donating the second bed in their room to father/daughter Ronald and Christina, who are also favorites, though next week's scenes show some melodrama going on there... Hippies Rachel and TK recall the exuberance and skill of those other TAR hippies from a few seasons back but manage to underplay their kookiness. Lesbian ministers Kate and Pat also seem like a strong, fun team.

There are already cracks in the facades of several dating teams: Jennifer and cheating heart Nathan were at the end of their tether last night when faced with a stubborn donkey and Lorena and Jason are already having difficulty communicating. I'm torn about Lorena and Jason; he doesn't listen even when he's faced with driving in the wrong direction (not sure how that happens when you have a map) but Lorena is abrasively histrionic. Hello, people! It's the first leg of the race.Maybe we can also stop making proclamations like Jennifer did about the hike up the hill being "the hardest thing" we've ever done in our lives. I was extremely happy to see these two at the bottom of the pack when they were stuck basically abusing their donkey in the road. Yes, it was a frustrating event when your donkey doesn't seem to want to move and just keeping braying but you've got to keep it together and finish any way you can.

Still, I'm happy that Jennifer and Nathan finished at the bottom of the pack, but still ahead of friends Ari and Staella, who were thankfully the last team to arrive. These two had got to be one of the most irritating teams ever to run the Race; Ari's shrill voice alone made me want to strangle him with the hay he was shoving in that poor donkey's face. Still, one does have to believe in karma a little bit. The gruesome twosome stole a taxi intended for Ronald and Christina, only to wind up with the very worst-behaving donkey, which they promptly attempted to drive to an early grave. I can breathe a little easier knowing that we won't have to put up with their bratty ways any longer.

And on a day where the writers strike is making the air in Hollywood more than a little thick, that's a very, very good thing.

Next week on The Amazing Race ("I've Become the Archie Bunker of the Home"), the teams travel to the Netherlands, where Grandpa Donald encounters a muddy pole-vaulting challenge and Christina stands up to her father, demonstrating that all is not well in their relationship.

On Your Mark: CBS Unveils Teams for "The Amazing Race"

It's with a certain glee that I relish the return of The Amazing Race to the airwaves following the cancellation of the woefully dismal Viva Laughlin.

It's been far too long since we've seen Phil Keoghan raise his eyebrow, describe for the umpteenth time what a Road Block is, or comment on what place some uber-competitive Americans with some unusually spelled names came in a race around the world. (Seriously, this time round there's a Goth vixen named Vyxsin.)

CBS has unveiled the contestants that we'll follow around the globe from the comfort of our living rooms as they make pit stops in such far-flung locals as Ireland, Lithuania, and Croatia (typically while sniping at each other and making ethnocentric comments about the locals).

So who's racing this time around? Let's find out.

Ronald Hsu, 58, and Christina Hsu. Father/daughter from Tacoma, Washington.

Kynt Cothron, 31, and Vyxsin Fiala, 29. Dating Goths from Louisville, Kentucky.

Lorena Segura, 27, and Jason Widener, 23. Dating couple from Sherman Oaks, California.

Azaria Azene, 27, and Hendekea Azene, 23. Brother/sister from Torrance, California.

Kate Lewis, 49, and Pat Hendrickson, 65. Married lesbian ministers from Thousand Oaks, California.

Shana Wall, 32, and Jennifer McCall, 32. Friends from Los Angeles, California.

Donald Jerousek, 68, and Nicolas Fulks, 23. Grandfather/grandson from Chicago and Wisconsin.

Jennifer Parker, 23, and Nathan Hagstrom, 23. Dating couple from California.

Rachel Rosales, 23, and TK Erwin, 22. Dating couple from Huntington Beach, California.

Marianna Ruiz, 25, and Julia Ruiz, 26. Sisters from Miami who now live in... (you guessed it!) Los Angeles, California.

Ari Bonias, 21, and Staella Gianakakos, 23. Best friends from California.

Gee, it is just me or did the casting directors for TAR go a little overboard this season with the contestants from California? Could sunny CA be the new Texas? You be the judge.

The Amazing Race premieres Sunday, November 4th at 8 pm on CBS.

What's On Tonight

8 pm: Survivor: China (CBS); My Name is Earl/30 Rock (NBC); Smallville (CW); Ugly Betty (ABC)

9 pm: CSI: Crime Scene Investigation (CBS); The Office/Scrubs (NBC); Supernatural (CW); Grey's Anatomy (ABC)

10 pm: Without a Trace (CBS); ER (NBC); Big Shots (ABC)

What I'll Be Watching

8 pm: Ugly Betty.

On tonight's episode ("A League of Their Own"): Henry is not happy when Betty starts to enter the world of online dating; Betty meets a prospective beau at a bowling alley; Daniel and Alexis sit down to dinner with step-monster to-be Wilhelmina.

8:30 pm: 30 Rock.

What's on my mind grapes? It's the second season of the Emmy Award winning comedy. On tonight's episode ("Rosemary's Baby"), Liz is ecstatic when her idol Rosemary Howard (guest star Carrie Fisher) agrees to appear on the show but her radical beliefs lead Jack pressuring Liz to quit; Kenneth competes in a page-off; Tracy sees a therapist.

9 pm: The Office.

The disastrous one-hour installments of The Office are finally over so we can get back to the half-hour format we all know and love. On tonight's episode ("Local Ad"), Michael jumps at the opportunity to showcase his creative abilities when the Scranton branch of Dunder-Mifflin is asked to participate in a local ad, while Dwight gets sucked into the virtual world of Second Life.

10-11 pm: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia on FX.

FX's hilariously subversive comedy It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia continues tonight with two back-to-back episodes. On the first ("Dennis Looks Like a Registered Sex Offender"), Dennis is mistaken for a recently released child molester but is more upset by how overweight the sex offender is. On the second ("Dennis and Dee Get a New Dad"), a repeat from last season, Dee gets a letter from a man (Stephen Collins) who claims to be her real father, leading her to confront her parents.

Fat Lady Sings for "Viva Laughlin," While "Amazing Race" Waits in Wings

The fat lady has sung for musical drama Viva Laughlin.

Series, which died on stage in its two airings to date, has sung its last pop-inspired aria and has been yanked off of CBS' schedule, effective immediately.

Network will air a repeat of CSI in its Sunday at 8 pm timeslot before giving the time period over to returning reality series The Amazing Race, which launches on November 4th.

"If there ever was a season that I consider one of the best, it's this one," said Amazing Race's creator/director/executive producer Bertram van Munster in a statement. "It's insanely funny, fast-paced and dramatic all at once. Teams are in hot pursuit of one another at every location and its reality television at its nail-biting best."

This season on The Amazing Race, teams will travel approximately 50,000 miles, including first time stops in Ireland, Lithuania and Croatia.

Teehee! I cannot wait. For too long, The Amazing Race has been sadly absent from my already jam-packed television-viewing week.

Beauty Queens Not Crowned: Dustin and Kandice Do Not Win "The Amazing Race"

Excuse me while I wipe the vomit from my television.

I cannot believe that Eric and Danielle are now a million dollars richer and that Dustin and Kandice didn't win this thing. Hell, I'd rather Charla and Mirna won this rather than Eric and Danielle. Grr. It just makes me so damn angry.

Last night's season finale of The Amazing Race stirred up all sorts of emotions as I vacillated between hope that the Beauty Queens would win (making them the first female team to win TAR) and depression at the thought that they'd come in a close second. (Why couldn't there have been another flag challenge to throw Eric?)

Still, I was a little nervous when I saw the tension between Dustin and Kandice take their toll after the disastrous kayaking expedition off the shore of Shipwreck Beach in Hawaii. (Whose idea was it exactly to get out of the boat and *walk* with it?) The car ride afterwards was even more tense as Kandice attacked Dustin for her ego and poor teamwork. (Oh, come on, girls, don't fight.) But they quickly recovered and got their heads back in the game. I thought of all the teams, these two would have the best sense of how the other thought of their competitors, but I could not believe that Dustin changed her answer at the last second. Rob and Amber were definitely the least trustworthy team--though I love that Eric and Danielle seem to think that it's Danny and Oswald--and I wish that she would have gone with her first instinct.

Charla and Mirna, meanwhile, semi-toned it down this week and managed to snag a better flight from Tokyo to Hawaii, for all the good it did them. They proved themselves quite adept at finding better flight alternatives and with persuading, coercing, and kidnapping than the other teams. I do have an enormous amount of respect for what Charla has been able to accomplish, given her limitations (i.e., Mirna) and the fact that she's done simply amazing things both times that she's run this Race. All in all, I do think that the two of them played a better game than Eric and Danielle.

And then there's (gulp) All-Stars winners Eric and Danielle, who managed to escape elimination not once, but twice this season (why, oh, why couldn't they have gotten the cut earlier) and who didn't exactly run a very good race, what with them constantly being at each other's throats. Their success had more to do with luck at times (and their defeats via flying with bad luck) but when it counted, they seemed to stay in the game. I was hoping that their taxi driver would get lost or make a wrong turn or that they'd get stuck in traffic while the blondes sailed to victory, but in the end, that two-minute lead time they had coming out of the Mint gave them a huge advantage.

I'm still in shock that they won this thing and even more by Eric's completely disturbing call with a shorn Jeremy in Florida. Which was just all-out creepy, what with the promises of spankings, etc. These are the lowlifes that won an All-Star edition of Amazing Race?

To Eric and Danielle, don't ever forget that money doesn't equal good taste. To Charla and Mirna, keep on truckin' but lay off kidnapping people and using the phrase "it's a life or death situation." And, finally, to Dustin and Kandice, you should have won this game, but not if it was going to tear your friendship apart. I've been rooting for you from the start and hopefully this isn't the last we see of you.

And, I'm told The Amazing Race, while not officially renewed by CBS (not until the upfronts next week), is already in pre-production for next season, so TAR fans, fret not. The granddaddy of reality series will be back next season.

What's On Tonight

8 pm: How I Met Your Mother/The New Adventures of Old Christine (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC); Everybody Hates Chris/All of Us (CW); Dancing with the Stars (ABC; 8-9:30 pm); House (FOX)

9 pm: Two and a Half Men/The King of Queens (CBS); Heroes (NBC); Girlfriends (CW); The Bachelor (ABC; 9:30-11 pm); 24 (FOX)

10 pm: CSI: Miami (CBS); The Real Wedding Crashers (NBC)

What I'll Be Watching

8 pm: Waking the Dead on BBC America.

It's the return of the stylish smart UK murder investigation series. On tonight's episode, Boyd and his team investigate the discovery of a mummified couple who were, er, sexually conjoined, found in a concealed office, which ignites a scandal.

8 pm: Everybody Hates Chris.

On tonight's episode ("Everybody Hates Math"), Rochelle tutors Chris in math when he is forced to master algebra as part of a math competition but he ends up turning for help from Maxine, Rochelle's ex-math teacher mom. Meanwhile, Tanya takes the fall for Drew when he accidentially breaks Julius' favorite chair.

8:30 pm: Old Christine.

On tonight's episode ("Frasier"), Christine learns that her reckless evening of passion with Richard may have irreversibly damaged her chances of getting together with Ritchie's teacher, Mr. Harris (Blair Underwood).

9 pm: 24.

It's Day Six of 24. While FOX doesn't give us much in the way of previews, here's what we do know: Noah Daniels and Tom Lennox are forced to face off against presidential aide Lisa Miller (Kari Matchett) while Jack tries to deal with the looming international crisis in the face of Audrey's condition. I'm still more interested in what Karen Hayes is up to.

10 pm: The Riches on FX.

Is anyone else watching new drama The Riches on FX? On tonight's episode ("Cinderella"), Wayne's position at Panco is dependent on the Molloys pulling off the perfect dinner party but that's put in jeopardy by the arrival of Dahlia's murderous friend from prison.

"Teletubbies Go to War": Teams Enter the Military on "The Amazing Race"

Oh, Team Cha Cha Cha, I will miss you. For the second time, Danny and Oswald have placed fourth overall in the Amazing Race, just as they did back in Season Two.

I was really hoping Danny and Oz would make it to the final three, but instead we have two of my least favorite teams (Eric & Danielle and Charla & Mirna, if you're keeping score) racing for $1 million against the Beauty Queens. Dustin and Kandice, I've been rooting for you this whole time, so don't let me down!

Last night's episode of The Amazing Race featured the Beauty Queens at their finest, as they managed to stay ahead of the other teams the entire time, even when the other teams managed to get on the same flight as Dustin and Kandice. Though I am still not entirely sure how Charla and Mirna showed up at the airport so quickly behind the Beauty Queens as they were on a ferry that departed an hour later. Color me confused. In any event, I was whooping and hollering as the girls continued their winning streak, once again landing in the top spot. Plus, they seemed to have a hell of a good time getting there. Dustin completely got into the Roadblock and had an awesome time locating a "downed" pilot and making her way to the extraction point, where she was airlifted by helicopter. Can these two just win the top prize already?

Danielle's mental breakdown was hysterical as she began to wander in the jungle and wound up covered in spiders. I understand that the heat is on and only three teams will make it through this round to compete for a chance at $1 million, but come on now. You're using a fricking GPS to lead you to the pilot. Follow the arrow and keep walking. It's really not that difficult. I was hoping that Danielle's tantrum would have resulted in the gruesome twosome getting eliminated this week, but she managed to find the extraction point. I'd be curious to know just how long she was wandering out there because it seemed like quite a while.

Charla, meanwhile, couldn't keep her fingers off the GPS device and, despite her military escort and Mirna telling her, she kept pressing the screen and buttons of the device, resulting in an error about more than half the time. As much as I admire Charla, I couldn't help but roar with laughter as she repeatedly kept touching the damn thing.

Oh, Mirna and her accents. This week, she basically insulted a taxi driver with one of her put-on phony accents as she kept asking him for airport and then had the temerity to turn to the camera and explain that it always helps to ask a person in the right accent. Um, no, Mirna. How about you use your real accent and not some bizarro Spanish/Italian/Esperanto accent? Maybe then the person on the receiving end of your questions would understand you. Who else was cheering when they missed the first ferry?

I thought it sad that only Charla and Mirna chose the "humanitarian" Detour last night (but given the fact that the clue stated it would take longer, I understand the decision) but the experience did seem like a once-in-a-lifetime sort of thing. And anyone that puts Mirna in her place--a military officer chastised her for throwing stuff into the box for the drop as if the items were garbage--is A-okay with me.

And, Mirna, just because you haven't seen someone else the Internet, doesn't mean that they don't know HOW to use the Internet. Get a clue and drop the holier-than-thou attitude. How Danny and Oswald think that these two should win is beyond me.

One of the best lines of the night: "We're not sure whether we landed in Japan or in Alaska, because we felt the cold breeze, freezing cold, but we don't care." - Oswald, upon making in onto the flight with the other three teams.

It's down to the final three and, while I wish that two of the teams were replaced by others, I can't wait to see what happens next week. If the Beauty Queens win, I'll be ecstatic. And, as long as Eric and Danielle don't win, I'll be satisfied.

But I'm more than a little nervous because, if you haven't noticed, The Amazing Race hasn't yet been picked up for another season. Which means that there hasn't been any production begun for a twelfth installment of TAR and next week's episode might just be the last leg of the Amazing Race. Fingers crossed that it's not the case.

Next week on the season finale of The Amazing Race: Dustin and Kandice's relationship capsizes like their kayak, leading Dustin to be hurt by Kandice's words; Charla and Mirna attempt to outwit the other teams with their dazzling display of interweb know-how; the final challenge is a test to see how well teammates know one another. All this, plus one team walks away with a cool $1 million prize. Who will it be? Find out next week.

What's On Tonight

8 pm: How I Met Your Mother/The New Adventures of Old Christine (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC); Everybody Hates Chris/All of Us (CW); Dancing with the Stars (ABC; 8-9:30 pm); House (FOX)

9 pm: Two and a Half Men/The King of Queens (CBS); Heroes (NBC); Girlfriends/The Game (CW); The Bachelor (ABC; 9:30-11 pm); 24 (FOX)

10 pm: CSI: Miami (CBS); The Real Wedding Crashers (NBC)

What I'll Be Watching

8 pm: Waking the Dead on BBC America.

It's the return of the stylish smart UK murder investigation series. On tonight's episode, Boyd is requested by MI-6 to re-open an investigation involving the murder of an Iraqi rebel, even though the killer had been caught and convicted. Curious...

8 pm: Everybody Hates Chris.

On tonight's episode ("Everybody Hates Dirty Jokes"), Chris becomes popular after telling some dirty jokes gleaned from his parents' comedy albums, Drew gets some unwanted attention from a girl, and Rochelle tries to find her busybody mom a man.

8:30 pm: Old Christine.

On tonight's episode ("Friends"), Christine, Richard, Matthew, and Barb push one another's boundaries while they go on a road trip, following Ritchie's school camping trip in the desert.

9 pm: 24.

It's Day Six of 24. While FOX doesn't give us much in the way of previews, here's what we do know: Audrey experiences a severe post-traumatic reaction to her captivity in the hands of the Chinese, while Kari Matchett-sniffing Acting President Noah Daniels receives a rather shocking message from Russian President Suvarov. As for me, I'm more interested in what Karen Hayes is up to.

10 pm: The Riches on FX.

Is anyone else watching new drama The Riches on FX? On tonight's episode ("X Marks the Spot"), it's a return to some of the levity seen in earlier episodes as the Molloys plan a con on a disgraced baseball player in order to save their new life in Eden Falls.

Caution, Yield Ahead: Eric and Danielle Get Paused Again on "The Amazing Race"

Last night's episode of The Amazing Race was another one of those way too stressful installments, where I found myself perched on the edge of my couch hoping for the defeat of one of my two least favorite teams while hoping that, somehow, Danny and Oswald would make it to next week's leg.

Whew. I feel somewhat conflicted that the producers staged yet another non-elimination round so soon after the last one (that would be, er, last week) but, as it managed to save Danny and Oswald's skin after they arrived at the pit stop in dead last (after encountering the world's worst taxi driver in Macau), I can't be all that angry. Me, I was hoping we'd finally seen the last of the shrilly irritating Danielle and Eric. Alas.

The Yield. Nothing has been more contentious this season on TAR than the usage of those dreaded yellow Yields. The Beauty Queens rightly surmised last night that the Yields are in fact part of the race, a tool to be used as teams see fit. Would it feel terrible to be yielded? Most definitely. But if you're in this game (particularly for these teams who already ran it once before), you should have realized by now that it's not devious or underhanded to use one of the tools that the producers provided you with. Especially when the race for the final three is in its final hours and any lead, no matter how small, is a leg up over the other teams. Eric and Danielle, listen up: it's not personal, it's not underhanded, it's just the game. And you would have yielded the Beauty Queens had you gotten there first, so shut up about it already.

Danny and Oswald. I felt awful that Danny and Oswald found themselves in such an untenable position that they felt they needed to basically prostitute themselves for cash. Still, the idea of selling a Yield was such a brilliant Machiavellian move that I am amazed that no one's come up with the idea before now. Team Cha Cha Cha definitely needed money in order to complete this leg, given all of the expenses incurred with taxis and ferries. But I was hoping that the guys would have stuck to their guns and demanded protection money, rather than offer the girls the opportunity to pick another team to be Yielded. But, honestly, I was hoping the gambit would have led to Eric and Danielle get eliminated. Especially since, Charla and Mirna would have given the boys money with no strings attached. (Or said they would have, since I never actually saw them give them anything when told about their situation.) Would you have done the same thing had you been in Danny and Oswald's position?

Noodles. I definitely thought that the noodle challenge was the way to go though I was freaking out when Dustin and Kandice had to redo their batch after cutting their noodles far too thickly. Fortunately, they still managed to beat Charla and Mirna, who showed up just as they were starting their second batch. I have to say, I really have no idea what Charla and Mirna were doing in the noodle shop. Charla managed to get up onto the work surface with the dough and seemed to be rolling or stomping or something, while Mirna tried to work the rod. The entire affair reminded me completely of the chocolate factory sequence from I Love Lucy. (Was I the only one who thought that?) Add to that the entirely comical scene in which Mirna attempts to drive a miniature car and ends up on the curb, before trying to physically pull the car, and you have pure comedy gold that had me rolling on the floor.

Mirna. I am so over her it's not even funny. Whether she's inventing new accents, punishing Charla (even after the detour ended) for misjudging the thickness of the noodles, or misinterpreting what actually happened with Danny and Oswald and the yield (she blames the Beauty Queens for forcing them to Yield Eric and Danielle), she can never keep her mouth shut. You make Charla do all of the difficult Roadblocks and now you're whining about having to drive the car? Idiocy.

Taxi. Danny and Oswald meanwhile decided to do the dragon and drum detour, which consisting of carrying an ornamental dragon's head and drum 3/4 mile to the lake, where they would receive their next clue. It would have been an easy challenge if they hadn't ended up with the aforementioned world's worst taxi driver, who took them to the end of the detour rather than the start, and then Danny led them to the lake in a completely circuitous route. Compound that with the fact that they then didn't seem to learn from their lesson and decided to use the same taxi driver to lead them to the pit stop and you then begin to understand why they arrived in last place. Not unsurprisingly, the taxi driver took them to the wrong mountain on the island of Taipa, which allowed Eric and Danielle (waiting out their 30 minute penalty) to check in before Team Cha Cha Cha arrived.

Ultimately, I am thrilled that Dustin and Kandice held onto their lead going into the final four (for a third time around!) next week. I'm really hoping that they do manage to become the first all-female team to win TAR. And I'm glad that Danny and Oswald are still in the race. Let's just hope they can pull out of last place and knock Danielle and Eric out of the competition. Fingers crossed...

Next week on The Amazing Race, Charla and Mirna participate in a US military supply drop in Guam, teams face a zero gravity challenge, and Danielle has yet another breakdown during a Roadblock. Will her ineptness finally lead to their elimination? Blurg.

What's On Tonight

8 pm: How I Met Your Mother/The New Adventures of Old Christine (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC); Everybody Hates Chris/All of Us (CW); Dancing with the Stars (ABC; 8-9:30 pm); Drive (FOX)

9 pm: Two and a Half Men/The King of Queens (CBS); Heroes (NBC); Girlfriends/The Game (CW); The Bachelor (ABC; 9:30-11 pm); 24 (FOX)

10 pm: CSI: Miami (CBS); The Real Wedding Crashers (NBC)

What I'll Be Watching

8 pm: Waking the Dead on BBC America.

It's the return of the stylish smart UK murder investigation series. On tonight's episode, it's a crossover with FX's The Riches! Okay, not quite. But Boyd and his team do investigate the death of a teenage boy, deeply involved with a band of Irish Travelers.

8 pm: Everybody Hates Chris.

On tonight's episode ("Everybody Hates Gambling"), Chris becomes his neighorhood's go-to odds maker when Doc discovers that he has an innate talent for predicting the outcome of sporting events. Naturally, his lucky streak only lasts so long...

8:30 pm: Old Christine.

On tonight's episode ("My Big Fat Sober Wedding), Christine tries to remain sober at a friend's wedding but the lack of liquor doesn't stop her loose lips.

9 pm: 24.

It's Day Six of 24. While FOX doesn't give us much in the way of previews, here's what we do know: Jack is very much on the opposite side of Mike Doyle now that he's gone rogue (again!) to trade some sensitive schematics for the release of Audrey, while Noah Daniels prepares to address the country after assuming the Presidential office and Tom Lennox engages in a personnel shakeup. Hmmm, more Kari Matchett, perhaps?

10 pm: The Riches on FX.

Is anyone else watching new drama The Riches on FX? On tonight's episode ("Virgin Territory"), Wayne and the family return to the Traveler's camp after learing of Earl's, er, death (at the hands of Dale, no less), but Dale has his own plans for the Molloys (involving settling some scores) while Ginny tries to force DiDi and Ken to wed.

Everybody Was Kung-Fu Fighting: "The Amazing Race" Heads to Hong Kong

Why is it that Mirna consistently manages to get under my skin week after week? I wish I could channel some Zen-like calm and push her out of my thoughts but, no matter what I try, I can't get her shrill, irritating voice out of my mind.

For those of you with an aversion to Mirna (like yours truly), this week's episode of The Amazing Race offered no respite from her particular brand of hypocrisy and oddness. I'm still not sure why Dustin and Kandice (a.k.a. the "Yield Queens," according to Mirna) deciding to use the Yield last week against competitors Eric and Danielle wasn't playing the game morally, but the manipulative Mirna trying to get them bumped off a flight (or get themselves bumped up the waitlist) wasn't low-handed. Or that Danny and Oswald had the temerity to use the Fast Forward rather than just "play the game." Why do the rules only apply to the people Mirna doesn't like?

I've said it before and I'll say it again: the Yield IS part of the game; that's why it's there. Whether teams choose to use it (and possibly face "yield karma") or not is entirely up to the teams. Same with the Fast Forward. But ultimately any of these "tricks" are tools of the game, mental and physical strategies to be employed, with consequences. Will Dustin and Kandice get the same treatment next week when another Yield turns up on the Race? We'll see, but whatever happens, that yellow Yield sign is a fantastic motivator to arrive before the other teams.

Flight issues were again the buzzwords of the day as teams had a difficult time trying to depart of Kuala Lumpur for Hong Kong. Unsurprisingly, Dustin and Kandice ran afoul of Charla and Mirna in the airport as Mirna put on her best wacky accent and tried to manipulate the ticket agent into placing them higher than the Beauty Queens on the second flight out to Hong Kong. (Danny and Oswald, who managed to get on the first plane, gave them their waitlist group code.) Fortunately, the Beauty Queens held firm and both teams were able to get on the flight in the end (damn!), leaving Eric and Danielle stranded once again in last place. (Tee hee!)

Who else thought that the kung fu fighting Detour looked like a blast? Getting to scale an 11-story building while ninja-clad martial artists engage in a battle royale all around you? Sounds like an absolutely awesome way to spend the time in Hong Kong. I was surprised that, after waffling for about twenty minutes, Charla and Mirna decided to scale the building instead of searching for a matching sign, but I am amazed at the way Charla manages to push herself to complete every task (except for the sausage-eating, that is). Mirna, of course, couldn't shut up long enough to enjoy the exercise and continued to make inane comments.

Meanwhile, Danny and Oswald went for the second of only two Fast Forwards on the Race this season and were stunned to realize that they'd get to participate in a car-driving Hong Kong movie stunt. This week, Danny was in a much, much better mood than the snippiness we saw from him last week and he seemed to really enjoy flipping over in the car. Oswald, on the other hand, wanted to be far, far away from there. But I was happy to see the duo patch up their friendship and concentrate on the game. If they don't make a huge mistake next week, I really do think that they'll be racing in the final two. (Yay!)

Meanwhile, I was roaring with laughter that Charla and Mirna managed to get on the wrong ferry (going to Kowloon instead of Hong Kong Island), but they quickly realized their error (the taxi driver drove them to the island instead of the ferry) and were able to correct it. And since they did end up taking a ferry to the island (just not the one they were supposed to), they didn't incur a penalty. Double damn.

Eric and Danielle. If I were in a race for a million dollars, I'd do anything to ensure I at least get a fighting chance at making it to the final round. Not so Eric and Danielle. When faced early in the episode with getting on the last flight, Eric suggested they step in a puddle, drop their hair drier, and electrocute themselves. Some winning determination there, guy! And when they were driving around in circles in Hong Kong--in last place, no less--looking for the Jockey Club, Eric patently refused to stop and ask for directions. I realize it's a male imperative to never admit defeat in the face of being, you know, lost, but when there's a million bucks on the line, I think it's okay to suck up your male pride and ASK FOR HELP. At least he didn't make his girlfriend do the physical challenge this week.

Sadly, while I was praying for Eric and Danielle to finally get the boot, I knew it was another non-elimination round, meaning that my two least favorite teams (guess who!) are still in the race. That said, I'm thrilled that Eric and Danielle are marked for elimination and Danny and Oswald and Dustin and Kandice are in the top two. Here's to hoping that the final episode shows these two in a race to the finish...

Next week on The Amazing Race: Yield ahead as Charla and Mirna attempt to make a deal with Danny and Oswald, but the Beauty Queens are doing a little wheeling and dealing of their own and set a trap for a fellow team; meanwhile, one team ends up driving a local car onto the sidewalk. Ha ha!

What's On Tonight

8 pm: How I Met Your Mother/The New Adventures of Old Christine (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC); Everybody Hates Chris/All of Us (CW); Dancing with the Stars (ABC; 8-9:30 pm); Drive (FOX)

9 pm: Two and a Half Men/The King of Queens (CBS); Thank God You're Here (NBC); Girlfriends/The Game (CW); The Bachelor (ABC; 9:30-11 pm); 24 (FOX)

10 pm: CSI: Miami (CBS); My Name is Earl/My Name is Earl (NBC)

What I'll Be Watching

8 pm: Drive.

I wasn't exactly floored (heh) by the two-hour pilot but I'll check out episode 3 before I make up my mind. On tonight's episode ("Let the Games Begin"), Alex is arrested and gets separated from Corinna, while Violet and John continue their lying streak to their loved ones back home.

8 pm: Everybody Hates Chris.

On tonight's repeat episode ("Everybody Hates Snow Day"), Chris accidentally ends up going to school on a snow day, only to get trapped inside with Principal Edwards (guest star Jason Alexander) until Rochelle and Julius are tracked down. Worst. Day. Ever.

8:30 pm: Old Christine.

On tonight's episode ("Faith Off"), one of ex-husband Richard's construction jobs is threatened by Christine's dominating nature. Pat yourself on the back for that one.

9 pm: 24.

It's Day Six of 24. While FOX doesn't give us much in the way of previews, here's what we do know: Jack is thrown by the reappearance of the thought-to-be-dead Audrey, who appears to be in Chinese custody, while CTU is forced to change their plans when Palmer stirs things up in the administration. Wake me up when Kim and the cougar show up.

10 pm: The Riches on FX.

Is anyone else watching new drama The Riches on FX? On tonight's episode ("Recklace Gardening"), DiDi's, er, special needs fiance is back in the picture and living with the Malloys, while Dale initiates a power play back at the travelers' camp.

"Dirty, Dirty Hookers": Yet Another Reason I Want Eric Off "The Amazing Race"

Wow. I never thought that Eric was the epitome of refined wit, but it blew my mind watching last night's episode of The Amazing Race just how misogynistic and repulsive this guy truly is. Sure, I should have had an inkling of that fact from his advice to his bleached blonde girlfriend Danielle to "use your boobs" during a Roadblock, but last night definitely summed up his entire persona, idiotic t-shirts and all.

I'd like to point out first of all that the Yield is part of the Race itself and has been for quite some time. It's as much a part of the game as the Detours and Roadblocks (and, yes, the dreaded Intersection); that said, I never understand why people get so angry at being Yielded. Frustrating? You bet, especially when there's a possibility that you could be in last place. I get it. But to become so irate that you refer to the people who yielded you (that would be Beauty Queens Dustin and Kandice) on national television as "dirty, dirty hookers" and "dirty pirate hookers" steps over a line into poor sportsmanship, mean-spiritedness, and misogyny. There, I've said it. I really do think it is one of the lowest points in any season of TAR and made me question Danielle's sanity if she were to stay with this guy when all of this is over.

Let's step back for a second. Last night's episode saw the teams travel to Kuala Lampur, Malaysia via several different flights and connections. And sadly, Uchenna and Joyce took the riskiest method possible, leaving themselves only one hour to make an international connection. Unfortunately, they arrived in Frankfurt and did not have enough time to check into the flight and were delayed until the next day, sealing their fate. Charla and Mirna meanwhile used the hotel internet (after refusing to let Eric and Danielle get onto one of the two computers they were using) to secure the earliest possible flight, something the hotel concierge and the airline representative seemed unable to do for Team Cha Cha Cha or Uchenna and Joyce.

Charla and Mirna blew their lead of several hours pretty quickly by opting for the cookie Detour (how many times have I said not to do the Detour that involves searching?), which forced teams to eat their way through 600 boxes of cookies in search of one that had a black licorice center (yum!). The cousins spent so many hours there that Dustin and Kandice managed to catch up and wisely picked the batik Detour, which they finished quickly, leaving Charla and Mirna in their dust... in fact, they completed the Roadblock (which involved collecting residents' used newspaper on bicycle) before Charla and Mirna even showed up. Brava, girls.

Personally, I think it was smart for the Beauty Queens to yield Eric and Danielle. At that point, they had no idea where they were or how far behind them the gruesome twosome were, so it's just smart gamesmanship, rather than pointlessly making an enemy, according to Danielle. Correct me if I'm wrong but is this a race to win a million dollars or to make friends? Besides, you mean to tell me, that Eric wouldn't have yielded Charla and Mirna if they had gotten to the Yield first? Puhlease. He would have done so in a heartbeat, given his punitive actions at the airport earlier.

Meanwhile, I was shocked to see Danny and Oswald, easily the two of the calmest participants, nearly at each other's throats. Oswald was entirely right to be suspicious of the cookie Detour and Danny was acting petulant for no reason whatsoever. But guys, you need to stick to a decision; you can't waffle back and forth between two Detours. Fortunately, in the end, they decided to go for the batik challenge instead... and, even more fortunately, Uchenna and Joyce were a day behind the other teams. You can't put a price on that kind of luck.

Next week on The Amazing Race: Dustin and Kandice clash with Charla and Mirna at an airline ticket counter, a challenge forces teams to act like kung-fu fighters, and everyone gangs up on the Beauty Queens in an attempt to eliminate them from the Race. Will it work? (Let's hope not.)

What's On Tonight

8 pm: How I Met Your Mother/The New Adventures of Old Christine (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC); Everybody Hates Chris/All of Us (CW); Dancing with the Stars (ABC; 8-9:30 pm); House (FOX)

9 pm: Two and a Half Men/The King of Queens (CBS); Thank God You're Here (NBC); Girlfriends/The Game (CW); The Bachelor (ABC; 9:30-11 pm); 24 (FOX)

10 pm: CSI: Miami (CBS); Thank God You're Here (NBC)

What I'll Be Watching

8 pm: Everybody Hates Chris.

On tonight's repeat episode ("Everybody Hates Hall Monitors"), Tanya learns that her friends are hanging out with her just to get close to Drew, while Chris makes the uncomfortable realization that his classmates don't take him seriously when he becomes hall monitor. Word to the wise, Chris: hall monitor has never equalled popularity. Ever.

8:30 pm: Old Christine.

On tonight's episode ("The Real Thing"), Christine once again proves why she should not be allowed near any electrical equipment when she sends an email meant for BFF Barb to all of the parents at Ritchie's school. Ouch.

9 pm: 24.

It's Day Six of 24. While FOX doesn't give us much in the way of previews, here's what we do know: the administration continues their offensive maneuver, Jack comes face to face with Fayed (finally) and there's yet another shocking development. Wake me up when it's Day Seven.

10 pm: The Riches on FX.

Is anyone else watching new drama The Riches on FX? On tonight's episode ("The Big Floss"), Wayne is forced to cover up one of Hugh's, er, shadier deals, while Dahlia tries to find ways of amusing herself. Just stay away from the meth, Dahling.

Tiny Tune Adventures: Discord on "The Amazing Race"

Wow. Two hours of The Amazing Race? Way too much drama for me on a Sunday night, though I do have to say that I would have been peevishly outraged had they broken the episode into two parts, given the fact that--a first in Race history--teams were beginning a new leg of the Race before the trailing teams had finished the last one. Way to go, Dustin and Kandice!

It really was two hours of twists and turns and uncomfortable alliances but I'll limit my comments to just a few salient points. After all, I don't want to be droning on endlessly like Mirna or something.

The Best Laid Travel Plans. Is it just me or has this season of TAR featured the most excruciating travel sequences ever? Some teams, like the Guidos or Eric and Danielle (ha!) have faced setbacks time and time again. Last night was no exception as two teams (forced to "work" together) missed their connecting flight by mere seconds and watched in horror as they moved the stairs away from the plane, leading Joe to run out on the tarmac and start screaming and waving. Yes. That actually did happen. (In the end, it took a solid 30 hours for these teams to arrive in Warsaw.)

Uchenna and Joyce missed their connecting flight in Frankfurt, which would have put them tied for first with Dustin and Kandice, but managed to make up the time during a massive equalizer that had first place team, Dustin and Kandice, wait over 12 hours for a charter bus to Auschwitz.
The Horrors of Humanity. I'm talking about the teams' experiences at a nighttime, candlelit Auschwitz, even more haunting and sobering at night. I was glad to see that each of the teams treated it like the solemn memorial that it is and stopped "racing" for the duration of their time there, treating the memorial as a stark reminder of what humanity can do to itself. (And who knew Uchenna was such a philosopher?)

Intersection. Poor Dustin and Kandice got screwed by a taxi driver who had no idea where he was taking the girls in Warsaw and blew their enormous lead (at one point they were at least 15 hours ahead of the last place team). So I was literally screaming at the television when they arrived at the Intersection (remember those?) third, meaning that they would have to wait at least 4 hours for other teams to arrive to link up, as Danny and Oswald and Uchenna and Joyce had already departed together... for the fast forward. And the Beauty Queens were doing sooooo well this leg, too. Grr. I was really hoping they'd be able to come in first two weeks in a row and get their heads back in this game. Alas...

Danny and Oswald. Are these the two nicest guys to ever run the race? They're reflective when they need to be (Oswald was really affected by the concentration camp and reminded of his life in Communist Cuba), silly when they can be, and they are just plain nice to everyone on the race (remember last week when they helped an ailing Charla?). Even so, I was surprised that they gave Uchenna and Joyce the prize when both teams jumped onto the Pit Stop as a single unit. Sweet.

Charla and Mirna. What can I say about these two that I haven't already? When they're not switching into bizarre foreign accents for no reason, they are getting into people's faces in an aggressive, confrontational manner. Like ticket agents, for example. It was so uncomfortable to watch Mirna harass the travel agent in Zanzibar, calling her "my sister" and then speaking nastily to her a second later. Shudder. Likewise, the altercation with the taxi driver in Warsaw ("I am a young girl! I don't have $100.") was equally embarrassing for everyone involved. But the worst is the way that Charla and Mirna bark at one another (which the Beauty Queens found hilarious during the sausage-eating detour) and the fact that they seem to have no understanding of who should do a particular challenge. Did it really make sense for Charla to don the armour and lead a horse--ten times her size--to the castle gates... in the dark?

Fortunately, my three favorite teams are in the first three spots and I am hoping it stays that way. I'd be thrilled if Danny and Oswald or Dustin and Kandice win. And while I adore Uchenna and Joyce, they have won TAR once before, but even I wouldn't feel bad if they won again. Who are you rooting for to take home that cool $1 million prize and why?

Next week on The Amazing Race: Charla and Mirna and Eric and Danielle clash over some computer time, Danny and Oswald reach their breaking point, and the teams head to Malaysia, where one team is surprised to learn that they've become targets of another team.

What's On Tonight

8 pm: College Basketball (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC); Everybody Hates Chris/All of Us (CW); Dancing with the Stars (ABC; 8-9:30 pm); Prison Break (FOX)

9 pm: Deal or No Deal (NBC); Girlfriends/The Game (CW); The Bachelor (ABC; 9:30-11 pm); 24 (FOX)

10 pm: How I Met Your Mother/Two and a Half Men (CBS); The Black Donnellys (NBC)

What I'll Be Watching

8 pm: Everybody Hates Chris.

On tonight's repeat episode ("Everybody Hates Eggs"), Chris and Greg wind up with that age old heath class project: caring for an egg as an exercise in parenting skills. Meanwhile, Julius makes the frightening realization that the family's electric bill is way over their budget. Ouch.

9 pm: 24.

It's Day Six of 24. While FOX doesn't give us much in the way of previews, here's what we do know: CTU is forced to take immediate action when Jack relays intel he's gained on Russian terrorist Gredenko (Mr. Gredenko to you), while Noah Daniels and the president continue to clash.

10 pm: The Riches on FX.

Is anyone else watching new drama The Riches on FX? On tonight's episode ("Been There, Done That"), Doug Rich's ex-wife comes after the family for missing alimony, leading Doug to try to make the problem go away before she blows their cover.

"We Bought Fruit": Cha Cha Cha Thisclose to Beating Charla and Mirna on "Amazing Race"

It's official: Charla and Mirna have completely worn out their welcome in reality TV.

Last night's episode of The Amazing Race reinforced those feelings for me as, through a fluke of luck most likely unforeseen by the producers and travel specialists of TAR, Charla and Mirna not only managed to keep their first place lead over the other teams but seemed for a little while to be nearly a full day ahead of their competition.

As it were, thanks to some weather problems, Charla and Mirna (sorry, but I refuse to call them "Too Hot to Handle") were unable to board their traditional African dhow to Zanzibar until the following morning (wahoo!), leaving time for Danny and Oswald to catch up to them.

I'm still not entirely sure what the hell happened last night regarding the ongoing travel snafus as teams attempted to leave Maputo. Sure, there have been times in the past when securing airline tickets has been problematic at best, but last night took that to a whole new level of ridiculousness. Had there not been (rather suspicious) weather problems in Dar Es Salaam, potentially Charla and Mirna could have reached the pit stop a full day and a half ahead of the last place team. That's not too good planning nor is it good television. I'd love to know what actually happened to cause the teams to get so far behind (and nearly get stranded in Johannesburg). Any theories?

Danny and Oswald meanwhile decided to have fun with Charla and Mirna, who suddenly developed a severe lack of sense of humor, missing the point of every single one of Team Cha Cha Cha's jokes, especially when Owsald joked that they were going to trade the cousins for food (not to mention the hilarious faux turf war he tried to start with Mirna). Then again, Mirna had no idea what a catamaran was, so maybe a sense of humor isn't all that she's missing upstairs.

The gruesome twosome continued their swath through Africa, armed with more bad foreign accents to use on people. This week, Charla got in on the action, attempting an Italian accent while pleading with an airline representative. Mirna continued the same strategy of attempting to confuse locals with with strange and confusing (and often offensive) accents, offering a grotesquely mangled and drawn-out "nobody?" when told who no one could book them airline tickets at this time.

Which brings me to the fact that Team Cha Cha Cha would now be in first place if they hadn't stopped to buy some fruit along the way. Yes, they were dehydrated after the long boat trip to Zanzibar, and, yes, they were in the lead and hadn't even seen the other teams, but come on now, guys. It's a race and there will be plenty of time to stop at the local market AFTER you reach the Pit Stop. But Danny and Oswald do decide to stop off along the way to the Road Block (though they do catch up with Charla and Mirna), leading the cousins to nab the first spot at the Pit Stop.

(Aside: just how great was it to see Eric and a hysterical Danielle get yanked right off of that plane and then be forced to race with Teri and Ian and the Guidos? Har har. Personally, I loved seeing the looks on their faces when they realized they really weren't getting on that flight. Priceless.)

Uchenna and Joyce manage to survive Phil-imination this week and, even with the 30 minute time penalty, arrive third, followed by the Beauty Queens (which means my fave three teams are all in the top four slots right now). But for Teri and Ian, a day behind the other teams, their final showdown with the Guidos put them in last place and, for Teri, it's finally a chance to get back to Miami as she mentioned a zillion times last night. (Or as close as the Elimination Station, anyway).

Next week on The Amazing Race: Danielle and Eric have a nasty spat, leading Danielle to finally tell Eric he needs to grow up (about time), while Joe attempts to outrun a plane (seriously) and Charla gets suited up in armor for a challenge, only to land flat on her face. (Ouch.) Remind me again: why isn't Mirna doing this challenge?

What's On Tonight

8 pm: How I Met Your Mother/The New Adventures of Old Christine (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC; 8-10 pm); Everybody Hates Chris/All of Us (CW); Dancing with the Stars (ABC; 8-10 pm); House (FOX)

9 pm: Two and a Half Men/Rules of Engagement (CBS); Girlfriends/The Game (CW); 24 (FOX)

10 pm: CSI: Miami (CBS); The Black Donnellys (NBC); What About Brian (ABC)

What I'll Be Watching

8 pm: Everybody Hates Chris.

On tonight's episode ("Everybody Hates Baseball"), Chris is forced to choose between going to a baseball game with his dad or taking Tasha to the movies.

8:30 pm: Old Christine.

On tonight's repeat episode ("The Champ"), it's the return of Sad Dad (Andy Richter), whom Christine slept with in Season One... but now she is forced to admit that she is attracted to him.

9 pm: 24.

It's Day Six of 24. While FOX doesn't give us much in the way of previews, here's what we do know: the nuclear threat unveiled by Noah Daniels brings about some unexpected consequences, Karen Hayes refuses to step down, and Jack and Mike Doyle are forced to work together during a field operation.

10 pm: The Riches on FX.

Is anyone else watching new drama The Riches on FX? On tonight's episode ("Operation Education"), Wayne is forced start working for Hugh Panetta, who tells him that we must fire his predecessor on his first day, while Dahlia and the kids embark on a complicated scam to get them enrolled at a private school.

Rats! Charla and Mirna Manage to Finish First on "The Amazing Race"

I don't know about you, but I am still bummed about Rob and Amber not being in the race anymore. Considering I was rooting against them the first few episodes, that's certainly saying a lot.

But for the other teams, most of them weren't competing against one another but against Romber, the end-all and be-all competitors on The Amazing Race. And with them gone, I can't help but feel as though some of the teams had the wind taken out of their sails a little bit.

I'm still hoping Danny and Oswald will win this thing, even if their calm exteriors belied a little bit of friction last night when they were doing the avalanche beacon task... and somehow finished last. But you have to give these guys some credit: they never let adversity get the better of them in the long run, and they quickly bounced back from the squabbling to their normal, buoyant selves. They genuinely seem to have fun 99 percent of the time and, despite all the craziness of the race, still find time to smell the roses as it were. Even though they were stuck in gridlock traffic in last night's episode, they focused more on the fact that it was World AIDS Day than on the fact that they were, well, stuck in gridlock traffic. And have there ever been two nicer, more genuine racers on this show?

Charla and Mirna are officially driving me crazy. After last week's nasty confrontation of Amber after she lied to them (duh), I didn't think they could possibly irritate me even more. But they proved me wrong with last night's episode! It drives me up the proverbial wall that they always, always manage to kidnap some local and force them (nearly at gunpoint) to accompany them all over the place. It's really one of the few constants in this race: Charla and Mirna stop to ask directions and before the poor local can refuse, they are suddenly being dragged along to multiple locations with no way of returning from whence they came. (My favorite has got to be when Charla and Mirna, still wearing bathing suits, jumped back into the car with a local, admitting how strange it looked.) So it was no surprise last night when they did just that, abducting someone off the street and forcing them to direct their driver. Grr. The other truly irritating thing about them is how they randomly break into inappropriate languages, like thanking Mozambique residents in Italian, or how Mirna suddenly speaks in weird, broken English with strange Spanish-sounding accents no matter where they might be. (I'm thinking of last night's "Hollywood! Hollywood!" manicure sales pitch in the market.)

So I was shrieking with frustration when this annoying twosome arrived at the Pit Stop first, the only time they've placed first the two times they've run the race. I'm really, really, really not sure why only Charla and Mirna and the Beauty Queens chose the manicure challenge over the coal-shoveling one, as it sounded so much easier and less intensive. (Especially Danny and Oswald, who always prefer pampering over labor.) Instead, nearly all of teams selected the coal-shoveling and delivery selection of the Detour (except for Teri and Ian, who ended up at the wrong place and reluctantly did the manicure detour, only to discover it took all of 2 minutes to complete) and were forced to get pretty grubby in the process. People, read the clues and stop and think: what would be easier? What would take less time?

Aside: the rats used in the Roadblock were absolutely adorable. They may have changed my views on rats altogether and who knew you could train rats to sniff for landmines?

I was really hoping that Eric and Danielle would be eliminated last night but had a feeling that (A) they'd manage to sneak ahead of Uchenna and Joyce (who terrified me by not knowing where Mozambique is) and (B) that it would be a non-elimination round. But as much as Charla and Mirna annoy me, Eric and Danielle just make me seethe. Eric especially is just such a hateful, moronic person. I am beyond tired of his idiotic t-shirts (such as the one that spells college with one L), his misogynistic, homophobic attitude, and his nipple rings. Shudder. Please, Phil, work your magical powers and get these two eliminated fast. I just can't take them anymore.

As much as I love the Beauty Queens, I am not sure what the hell is going on with Dustin and Kandice this season. They are so far off their game that they might as well be on Dancing with the Stars. Just when I finally thought they had their heads together, they walked right past the backpacks and avalanche beacons because they saw an arrow pointing them to the glacier... and then walked all the way up there and started looking for the beacons. Argh. Fortunately, they chose correctly at the Roadblock and managed to come in second. Hopefully they use their lead time wisely next week.

As for Uchenna and Joyce, they are extremely lucky that this was a non-elimination leg. But they're marked for elimination next week unless they can finish first or will receive a 30-minute time penalty. And in this race, 30 minutes is a long, long time.

Next week on The Amazing Race: Uchenna and Joyce fight to stay in the race, but Uchenna has some difficulties hitting his mark during a Roadblock, while Eric and Danielle are asked to leave a plane about to depart the runway, leading Danielle to have a breakdown in the airport terminal. I cannot wait!

What's On Tonight

8 pm: How I Met Your Mother/The New Adventures of Old Christine (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC; 8-10 pm); Everybody Hates Chris/All of Us (CW); Dancing with the Stars (ABC; 8-10 pm); House (FOX)

9 pm: Two and a Half Men/Rules of Engagement (CBS); Girlfriends/The Game (CW); 24 (FOX)

10 pm: CSI: Miami (CBS); The Black Donnellys (NBC); What About Brian (ABC)

What I'll Be Watching

8 pm: Everybody Hates Chris.

On tonight episode ("Everybody Hates DJs"), Chris suddenly becomes popular when he fills in for a radio DJ who is arrested during a party. Hmmm, something tells me that won't last very long.

8:30 pm: Old Christine.

On tonight's episode ("Sleepless in Mar Vista"), Christine attempts to become more politically active, but naturally runs afoul of an obsessive activist who disagrees with Christine's views.

9 pm: 24.

It's Day Six of 24. While FOX doesn't give us much in the way of previews, here's what we do know: CTU is hot on Gredenko's heels following the events at the Russian consulate, Jack is forced to cope with some shattering news, and Noah Daniels toys with some rather dangerous strategies.

10 pm: The Riches on FX.

Is anyone else watching new drama The Riches on FX? On tonight's episode ("Believe the Lie"), Wayne is forced to become Doug Rich in order to, you know, actually pay for the family's luxe new lifestyle. And what better way to do that than to show up for work?

Stung By A Spelling Bee: An "Amazing Race" Elimination Shocker

Oh. My. God.

I am in shock. Serious, serious shock. And I never thought I'd be capable of uttering the words, but I'm sort of heartbroken about Rob and Amber getting eliminated.

Yes, sometimes even I can surprise myself. It seems that the team I was previous rooting to lose (for the last several years, it seems) finally won me over... just in time for them to get booted from The Amazing Race in a shocking twist, all because Rob couldn't spell Philippines.

That's right. It didn't come down to a foot race or airline tickets or unclear directions. What it came down to in the end was that one single mistake during the Detour in which Rob correctly realized that Magellan's travels began in Seville (come on people, common sense says it couldn't have been Guam) but couldn't manage to suss out that he had incorrectly spelled the Philippines. (He even hoped that the reason the judge wouldn't give them the clue wasn't because of a spelling error. Hint: it's one L and two P's.) Sure, they didn't get eliminated right there and then but it did propel Romber right to the back of the pack. It also didn't help that Rob lead them, paired up with the Beauty Queens, to the wrong location (not a naval museum, dude).

I would have never imagined that the team that came in first place three legs in a row would be duking it out with Charla and Mirna (yes, Charla and Mirna) for last place. But that's exactly what happened, as they arrived on top of one another at Bahia La Pataia, where the other teams had already gathered. From there, they would board boats, leaving 20 minutes apart, to take them across the bay to Isla Redonda, the End of the World, at the cutest darn post office you've ever seen. Rob and Amber boarded the second to last boat with Uchenna and Joyce and began the Road Block, a task involving searching through 1600 letters for a single envelope addressed to them. After reading the letter (from fellow competitors on the first TAR they ran), they can then search the island for the pit stop.

Was it just me or did Charla and Mirna's boat arrive WAY too quickly? The other teams' boats didn't ever seem to catch up quite that quickly. Mirna dives into the Road Block as Rob starts to sweat it out. I did NOT like the way that Charla actually spoke to Mirna and helped her out on the Road Block (which is, I believe, strictly verboten according to the rules) by suggesting she look at particular white envelopes. (Sorry, ladies, but cheating doesn't equal Amber lying to you a few minutes earlier; you were just too stupid to fall for it.) Mirna finds the envelope and they take off with Rob and Amber in pursuit a few minutes behind them.

But, alas, Rob and Amber are the last team to check in. Despite hoping this would be a non-elimination round, I was saddened to see Phil tell them that they have been eliminated from the race. I actually got a little verklempt at that part, to be honest. I really thought that Romber would be still kicking in the final leg of TAR: All-Stars, trying again for that million dollar prize at the end of the race.

Wow. I'm still just... shocked.

A few other thoughts: I was VERY happy that Danny and Oswald ended up coming in first place. I'm really rooting for these guys to take home the prize and maybe fight it out with the Beauty Queens, if they can get their act together. (They've been a wee bit off their game recently.)

Danielle: it's a charter flight to Argentina, not Australia. Ouch.

Karlyn couldn't bring herself to sign that letter to Dustin and Kandice? Oh puhlease. Loved that some of the letters were nice, while others were downright nasty...

Lastly, I could not believe the way that Mirna was talking to Charla. It was downright embarrassing to hear her talk to (and about) her cousin that way. I'm sorry but most of the time it's been Charla who's carried their team along, not Mirna. (Remember that slab of beef, anyone?) Mirna is so aggressively rude to Charla (the whole screaming her head off about the passports and then during the sign-building challenge) that my jaw was lodged on the floor. I just wanted to slap some sense into that woman. Seriously, I loathe her more each and every second she spends on screen. Am I alone in feeling this way?

Next week on The Amazing Race: it's fighting time as Eric and Danielle and the Guidos engage in a heated verbal exchange; the teams must complete a challenge involving a cute, little, furry... rat?

What's On Tonight

8 pm: The New Adventures of Old Christine/The New Adventures of Old Christine (CBS); Deal or No Deal (NBC; 8-10 pm); Everybody Hates Chris/All of Us (CW); Wife Swap (ABC); House (FOX)

9 pm: Two and a Half Men/Rules of Engagement (CBS); Girlfriends/The Game (CW); Supernanny (ABC); 24 (FOX)

10 pm: CSI: Miami (CBS); The Black Donnellys (NBC); What About Brian (ABC)

What I'll Be Watching

8-9 pm: Old Christine.

Yay! Old Christine returns with two new episodes tonight. On the first ("Sleepless in Mar Vista"), Christine discovers that she made some embarrassing phone calls while doped up on sleeping bills. On the second ("Undercover Brother"), Christine learns something rather stunning about Richard after sleeping with his attractive brother (guest star Charles Esten). Oh, Christine, I've missed you.

8 pm: Everybody Hates Chris.

On tonight's repeat episode ("Everybody Hates Superstition"), Chris discovers that everything he touches turns to gold (well, not literally, anyway) after Julius lends him a pair of lucky socks. Meanwhile, Drew and Tanya decide to pit Rochelle and Julius against one another. Uh-oh.

9 pm: 24.

It's Day Six of 24. While FOX doesn't give us much in the way of previews, here's what we do know: Noah Daniels and Tom Lennox have a heart-to-heart, Logan is forced to turn to a rather unexpected person for help with the situation at the Russian consultate, while newcomer Mike Doyle (Rick Schroder) joins the hunt for new leads.

10 pm: The Riches on FX.

It's the premiere of new drama The Riches on FX. In the pilot, a family of Irish Travellers (read: gypsies) assume the identities of a wealthy family in an upscale suburban community, following their accidental deaths. It's a bit of a messy pilot, but, trust me, things start to really kick up in the second and third episodes.