O.R. Mishap: CBS Cuts "3 Lbs."

The diagnosis is not good for 3 Lbs.

After just three (yes, count 'em, three!) airing, CBS has yanked medical drama 3 Lbs. off the schedule, effective immediately.

The drama, which starred Stanley Tucci, Mark Feuerstein (his series kiss of death continues!), and Indira Varma, was unceremoniously canned by CBS, which rushed the midseason medical drama onto the air.

3 Lbs
replaced the crime drama Smith (which CBS also cancelled after three airings) on Tuesdays at 10 pm. Like Smith, 3 Lbs. didn't deliver the audience CBS was craving, averaging a rather unhealthy 8 million viewers. Additionally, the series' ratings were 16% below Smith.

Call it a case of schadenfreude, but I can't help but smile when a cancelled cult audience series' replacement show winds up doing worse than the series it replaced. Ha-bloody-ha.

In other scheduling news, ABC will air five episodes of newsmagazine Primetime on Wednesdays at 10 pm, subbing in for freshman drama The Nine, which it put on hiatus over the Thanksgiving weekend.

Newsmag will air a limited series dubbed Primetime: Basic Instinct which will use hidden camera to document how people react to an array of frustrating/stressful situations, such as misbehaving children, annoying public cell phone use, and offensively prejudicial remarks from cab drivers.

The limited series is part of a 48-episode order for the season of Primetime, which has yet to receive a firm timeslot for the 2006-2007 season. It's unclear whether Primetime will remain in the slot as ABC has yet to release its January schedule, but given that they've yet to find a decent 10 pm companion for Lost, trying a newsmag rather than another serialized drama might be just the ticket.

Stolen "Smith" Episodes to Finally Air... Online

Smith fans, you might just be in luck. Just don't celebrate... quite yet.

Beginning today, CBS will begin streaming the remaining four episodes of now-cancelled crime drama Smith on their broadband channel, Innertube. Those four episodes represent the installments that were produced before CBS cancelled the series.

The first three episodes of Smith, which had aired in the US, will also be streamed online in an effort to get (would-be) viewers up-to-date.

Meanwhile, Warner Bros. Television, the studio behind Smith, will also be offering all seven completed episodes of Smith for download beginning this month on iTunes, AOL, and Amazon as well. (Additionally, CBS.com is offering synopses of the episodes that were never actually, you know, filmed, so that fans can read how the uncompleted episodes would have played.)

Just don't expect any filmed resolution to the storyline. Smith was never intended to be a seven-episode series so I somehow doubt any of the story arcs begun in the handful of aired segments will be tied up neatly. But perhaps that's fitting for a series that never intended to play by the rules.

CBS Yanks "Smith"

In an unexpected move, CBS has stolen crime drama Smith right off of its primetime schedule.

Smith, which features an all-star dream cast including Ray Liotta, Virginia Madsen, Amy Smart, Simon Baker, and Jonny Lee Miller, hadn't exactly caught on in the ratings like gangbusters, but it's surprising that CBS would pull the beleaguered show rather than test it in a less competitive timeslot.

While CBS has yet to use the C-word (that would be cancelled, folks), it does seem like the jig is up for Smith's team of thieves.

The news comes on the heels of NBC's announcement that it would not be ordering the back nine episodes of drama Kidnapped and would shift the series, now only 13 episodes total, to the Saturday night graveyard shift.

Meanwhile, the odds are that one of these series will be the next to get the axe: CW's Runway, ABC's Six Degrees, and CBS' The Class. Start placing your bets as to which will be next...

Pilot Inspektor: CBS' "Smith"

I may just have to change my original "What I'll Be Watching This Fall" post, as I sat down and finally watched CBS' new crime drama Smith this weekend. (What? It's taken me a long time to make my way through the stack of pilot DVDs.) While it's on following Gilmore Girls and Veronica Mars on Tuesday nights (10 pm ET/PT, to be exact), I'm going to be sure to leave enough room on my TiVo to make sure that I catch this compelling, amoral drama.

While one can't help but be impressed by what might just be the most marquee-friendly cast in primetime--Ray Liotta, Virginia Madsen, Jonny Lee Miller, Amy Smart, Simon Baker, and Franky G all star and Shohreh Aghdashloo has a recurring role--the pilot's premise alone earned major points in my book: it's a crime drama from the point of view of the criminals, who engage in high-stakes heists. But don't be alarmed; it's nothing like NBC's short-lived Heist. Instead, think of it as The Italian-American Job. Still co-starring Franky G, but without all of those adorable Mini Coopers everywhere.

Ray Liotta stars as Bobby, a married family man whose job for a plastic cup manufacturer is a disguise for his life as a crime mastermind. (The scene where Bobby kisses his wife goodbye, drives his sensible car to a secret apartment and opens up a treasure chest of gadgets before zooming off in a sweet ride is priceless.) Bobby is your typical reluctant thief; three or four more big jobs and he's out. He swears. Bobby wants a normal life, but how can you go from plotting elaborate heists to picking the kids up from soccer practice? Fortunately, Bobby's wife Hope (Virginia Madsen) isn't one of those clueless wives unaware of her husband's illicit schemes. Instead, Hope has a number of secrets of her own, including a rather drug-fueled felonious past herself, and she's onto what Bobby's been up to by the end of the pilot.

What Bobby is up to is the theft of two priceless paintings from a museum in Pittsburgh; the payment is a cool $2 million. And so Bobby quickly assembles his loyal team, each of whom brings their own set of skills (and drama): surfer/marksman Jeff (Simon Baker in a virtuoso performance); straight-from-jail Brit Tom (Jonny Lee Miller); gambling addict/tech guy Sean (Mike Doyle); sultry Vegas showgirl Annie (an icy Amy Smart); and body shop-owner Joe (Franky G). Don't get too attached to all of them though, as one of the above doesn't make it out of the pilot alive. (One guess who.) Adding to the tension is the fact that Tom and Annie have a history together, one that landed him in the slammer. And while he's willing to fall for her seductions, I have a feeling that Tom is also out for revenge.

I won't recount the action of the heist, just that it typically doesn't go quite according to plan and when criminals are forced to improvise, the results are usually bloody. Smith is no different in this respect but, fortunately, the gang (most of them anyway) are able to make a getaway in order to plan another caper for another day.

All of Smith's actors are operating at the top of their game. Liotta is a joy to watch in a nuanced double role; part gun-wielding felon, part piano-playing husband and father. He appears calm and controlled sitting at the piano, an unlit cigarette dangling from his lips, but in the next scene, his predatory drive emanates from him palpably. Likewise, Madsen is far from underused in her role of Hope, also playing two distinct personalities inhabiting the same body. The transformation that overtakes her when she realizes that Bobby is back in the game is so subtle yet powerful, as she becomes increasingly aware of being kept in the dark. (I don't know how Smith's producers managed to snag Madsen, but I hope they realize what a gem they have on their hands.)

Jonny Lee Miller is perfect as a morose and crushed felon who wanders right back into the thieving business less than a minute after walking out of prison. Amy Smart's Annie is a cold-blooded mercenary; she's as slick as silk and never misses a trick. That said, she's as brutal and deadly as a black widow. Shohreh Aghdashloo is brilliant as the gang's elegant, high-end fence; attending a wedding reception, she purrs and smiles as she and Bobby casually discuss a heist in the same way two others might a cocktail party. Even Franky G doesn't bother me as he usually does; here he plays an upstanding body shop owner with his eye on his best friend's wife.

But the real find here has got to be Simon Baker. It's simply impossible to take your eyes off his character Jeff, whether he's surfing in Hawaii or kicking a cat across the room (don't ask). There's a leonine grace about him and just as much presence. Previously known for his work on CBS' The Guardian and feature films like The Ring 2 and Land of the Dead, Baker's performance in Smith has redefined him as a star and I expect him to be one of the breakout actors of this fall.

One of the interesting elements of Smith is the show's skewed perspective. By coming at a crime drama from the POV of the criminals, I was expecting to find them somewhat neutered and completely sympathetic individuals (see Ocean's Eleven if you're looking for that). Instead, while we get to see Bobby and Company go about their daily lives and interact with family and friends, they are portrayed as genuinely bad guys. They're not above murder to achieve their ends; in fact, Jeff casually takes out two men with a sniper rifle in his very first scene after they shoo him off a "private" beach. Jeff and Annie might very well be sociopaths (see how Annie greets an "old friend" en route to the heist for an example). In the end, these are not cuddly criminals; rather, they're people you do not want to mess around with.

With Smith, John Wells (ER) has delivered a taut, gripping crime drama with genuine thrills and complex characters usually found in feature films than in television dramas. Every aspect of the pilot was magnificent, from the dazzling cast to the sparse script and tight direction. Clocking in at well over an hour, I'm not sure how much of this amazing pilot will make it on the air (unless CBS stuns us all by airing the entire pilot in a 1 1/2 hour slot), but the effect is breathtaking. Every line of dialogue, every glance, every moment of silence, is loaded with meaning and intent, yet the pilot never feels slow or overstuffed, despite its long runtime.

In fact, my only complaint is that Smith's title is so lackluster that it doesn't convey the energy and crackle of the show at all. (It refers to the nom du guerre given to Bobby by the FBI agents assigned to the museum case.) But that's a small issue for such a mightily entertaining show to overcome. So, while Liotta's Bobby might not be an Everyman, this is one Smith that definitely will stand apart from the pack.

What's On Tonight

8 pm: The King of Queens/How I Met Your Mother (CBS); Treasure Hunters (NBC); 7th Heaven (WB); Wife Swap (ABC); Hell's Kitchen (FOX); Major League Baseball (UPN)

9 pm: Two and a Half Men/The New Adventures of Old Christine (CBS); Treasure Hunters (NBC); 7th Heaven (WB); Supernanny (ABC); Hell's Kitchen (FOX)

10 pm: CSI: Miami (CBS); Medium (NBC); How to Get the Guy (ABC)

What I'll Be Watching

8-9 pm: Spaced on BBC America.

If you missed Friday's Stateside premiere of the 1999 sitcom Spaced (starring Shaun of the Dead's Simon Pegg), here's your chance to catch the first two episodes before another episode airs Friday. In the first episode ("Beginnings"), Tim (that would be Pegg) and Daisy are forced to pose as a couple in order to rent an apartment. On the second episode ("Gatherings"), Daisy and Tim decide to host a party a their new flat.

9 pm: Hell's Kitchen.

On tonight's installment ("8 Chefs"), Gordon switches the seriously uneven teams up a bit. And, it's a Hell's Kitchen first: the restaurant is open for lunch service and they're serving... children. If you thought that Top Chef's cafeteria challenge was a disaster, wait until the Hell's Kitchen crew fail to get their entrees out. There's no way I would miss this. And the idea of seeing Gordon Ramsay interacting with small children? Well, that just makes me shriek with glee.

9 pm: Treasure Hunters.

On tonight's episode--no, sorry, I just cannot watch it. After seeing the premiere, this is definitely one summertime offering that I'll be skipping out on.

11 pm: Lovespring International on Lifetime.

On tonight's episode, Lydia (Wendi McLendon-Covey) and Victoria (Jane Lynch) go on a stakeout together in order to receive a bonus check from a client. Until you've seen McLendon-Covey attempting to scale a chain-link fence in heeled boots, you haven't lived. Trust me.