Messages in a Bottle: LOST Thoughts #8

OH. MY. GOD.

I don't know about you but I didn't see that coming. We'll get to that shocker of an ending in just a bit.

On last night's episode of Lost ("Two for the Road"), missing castaway Michael returned to the fold, but he wasn't quite the man he used to be, Ana-Lucia and Sawyer took a tumble, and Hurley attempted a surprise for Libby, who received one of her own.

I've been waiting for weeks now to find out what sort of condition Michael was in when he stumbled out of the jungle directly into Jack and Kate's waiting arms. That's what I'd call highly suspicious, but in the land of Lost, such coincidences seem to be more fated meetings than chance encounters. Was Michael just heading in the direction of Jack's shouts? Um, no.

Back at the hatch, Ana-Lucia tries interrogating the prisoner while Locke is sleeping. (And by sleeping, I mean snoring so loudly that the entire station was vibrating like that funky electromagnetic rock.) The Other-Formerly-Known-as-Henry-Gale is still on his hunger strike/vow of silence and Ana goads him into attacking her... possibly by bringing some mango. As he squeezes the life out of her, the prisoner says that they're not the bad guys--Ana-Lucia is the killer, she's not "one of the good ones" (ding, ding!). But before he can finish the job, Locke knocks him out with one of his crutches. Damn, just when we were getting some info...

Flashback time, this week, belongs to Ana-Lucia. When last we saw her, she had murdered the man who shot her in cold blood after she failed to identify him as her attacker. His corpse has been discovered and Ana's mother--the police captain--knows that she's the one who killed him. She offers Ana help but gets nothing from her daughter, who promptly turns in her badge. Which brings Ana to an airport, where she's working the metal detectors. After work one evening, she ends up at the airport bar, where lo and behold, she runs into Jack's dad, Dr. Christian Shepherd, on his way to Australia.

The two start drinking and sharing stories and, before you know it, Christian offers Ana the chance to accompany him to Sydney, where he has some business. He needs a bodyguard and who better than someone who "stopped being a cop." They agree to give each other fake names to keep this agreement even more creepy and weird. Ana decides to call Christian "Tom," while Christian gives Ana the name of "Sarah." Which, hello, is pretty creepy in itself as that's the very same name as Jack's ex-wife! Hmmm, we don't think that Sarah was having an affair with Christian, do we? Nothing on Lost is ever just a coincidence, so I think that the choice of sobriquet was exceptionally intentional and loaded with meaning.

In Sydney, the two do nothing but drink for days on end before one night when Christian tells Ana that it's time for business. Ana drives him to the suburbs, where he goes up to a non-descript house and starts banging on the door. A blonde Australian woman answers (I thought it was Claire for a split second) and he demands to see his daughter. (Any chance it's Claire???) The woman throws him to the curb and he skulks back to Ana, who wants to know what's going on. Christian's not having any of it and he just wants a drink. Ana drives for what seems like hours and pulls up in front of a bar. She's decided that she's had enough running and she's going back to LA and wants Christian to come with her (she even tells him her real name) and opens her door, smacking right into... yep... Sawyer. Oh, cruel fate. So that's how Christian runs into Sawyer... and why he ended up in Sydney, which had always puzzled me. (Poor Jack. He'll never know that Ana knew his father and accompanied him to Australia. Or that his dad knew that Jack did the right thing. Or that he has a sister out there.)

Back in the present day, Locke goes to see the prisoner and confronts him about why he attacked Ana and not him. Locke was pinned under the door and "Henry" could have bludgeoned him to death, but he didn't. "Henry" says that he would never hurt Locke, he's "one of the good ones" (there we go again) and, in fact, he was on a mission to find him, when he was captured in Rousseau's trap. The Others sent him to find Locke and bring him back to them. "Henry" is dead no matter what; if the Others don't want to trade him, then Jack and the castaways will kill him. Or the Others will send someone to kill him. Their leader is a "brilliant man, a good man" but He is not a forgiving man. Locke is intrigued by this, so much so, that he covers for Ana when Jack sees the cut on her face and makes up a cover story about her banging her head on the sink. Why are you protecting the psychopathic liar, Locke?

Meanwhile, Ana is out for revenge. She wants a gun to kill the prisoner for, you know, attacking her and goes to Sawyer to try to get one, but he's not interested. That is, until later, when Ana "attacks" Sawyer and then when the two of them end up on the ground, starts kissing him passionately before mounting him and stripping off her clothes. A little while later, the twosome put their clothes on and Ana slyly grabs the gun without Sawyer even realizing it and says that if he tells anyone about this, she'll kill him.

Another would-be couple, Hurley and Libby, have their own romantic interlude... except that it doesn't quite go according to plan. Hurley wants to surprise Libby with something special and asks Sayid if he could fix up that radio they built and maybe play some music--or even static--for Libby and have his very own Say Anything moment. Sayid doesn't get the reference and instead suggests that Hurley take Libby to a private beach, the one he took Shannon to once. Hurley packs a bag of food and gets busted by Libby but Hurley soon leads her into the jungle to their romantic spot... except that they get lost and end up right back on their very own beach ("Look, there's Jin."). Which would have been fine with Libby, except that Hurley didn't actually bring any drinks or even blankets. Libby says that she'll handle the blankets and even score some wine. Hurley sparks to that idea, saying that maybe if he drinks enough, he'll remember where he knows her from, an idea which--judging from Libby's face--she doesn't like at all. And with that, Libby sets off for the hatch and those super-comfy blankets...

Back at the hatch, Michael comes to and fills in Jack, Kate, Locke, and Ana about what he saw of the Others, telling them that they're barely armed (two guns) and are mostly old people and women, who live in tents and teepees outside another hatch (ding, ding!). They're dirty and there's not very many of them. Kate sort of shifts uncomfortably during Michael's description, obviously remembering the theatrical costumes, fake beard, and glue that she saw in the medical station where Claire had been kept, but doesn't say anything. (I instantly knew that Michael was lying at this point. It's all too convenient.) Michael says that he didn't see Walt or the kids, but they must be there, probably in the hatch. They can easily take them, if they had guns. Jack decides it's time to get the guns back from Sawyer and he sets off with Kate and Locke, leaving Ana to look after Michael, a seriously bad idea if I ever heard one.

Ana tosses a knife at "Henry" and tells him to cut his ropes. Is she letting him go? Or is she going to shoot him. "Henry" tells her that he knows all about her, that Goodwin told the Others about her and said that he thought he could "reform" her. But Ana killed him. Ana says that Goodwin was going to kill her, but "Henry" asks if she's sure that that's what he was going to do. Ana draws her gun and points it squarely at "Henry."

Jack and the group confront Sawyer, who's not giving up the guns so easily. Jack pulls a gun on Sawyer as Sawyer reaches around to pull out his own piece... only to find it gone. He knows that Ana took it and Locke realizes that he may have made a mistake in not telling Jack about what happened between Ana and the prisoner. D'oh!

Ana is conflicted. She wants to kill "Henry" but knows that she can't, not after everything that's happened. She's not a killer, not anymore. Michael wakes up and wants to know where everyone is. Ana tells him about the prisoner and Michael offers to kill him, saying that the Others are animals, he's seen them, they took Walt, etc. It's his duty to kill "Henry." It's justice. Ana tells him the combination to the armory/cell as Michael weighs the gun in his hand. "I'm sorry," he says to Ana. AND THEN HE SHOOTS HER IN THE FREAKING CHEST. We hear Libby call out, "Michael?" and then a surprised Michael spins around and shoots her too. Libby sinks to their floor, still clutching those blankets, as Michael has a look of shock on his face. He then walks over to the cell and unlocks it. "Henry" stands up and Michael points the gun and himself and shoots himself in the arm.

Will Libby survive? Does Michael pin the attack on "Henry"? Is "Henry" dead too? Or has Michael released him? How can I wait a week for the answers to these questions?

Yes, I had a feeling that Michael might shoot Ana when she handed him the gun, but still, I didn't think they'd kill her off right after she slept with Sawyer. But then again, sex on the island seems to be fatal--just look at Shannon and Sayid. However, I don't think that Libby is dead, not yet, anyway. (The promo for next week says "she's dead," referring to Ana.) Also, we haven't gotten to the bottom of her past and connection to Hurley yet (while Ana's story was tied up rather neatly), so Libby might stick around on this earthly plane until the season finale at least. She knows too much and saw Michael shoot Ana, so he'll eventually have to finish the job before she can tell anyone else... As for his rationale, I don't think Michael is one of the "Others," but I do think that he's being coerced into working for them in exchange for Walt. Michael will do anything to get his boy back, including--as we saw last night--kill.

Next week: on another new episode of Lost ("?"), while Jack and the castaways try to deal with Ana's death and the bloodbath in the hatch, Eko and Locke set off to find a secret location that Eko believes can unravel the island's mysteries; the Virgin Mary and possibly the drugrunners' plane make another appearance; Michael looks frightening; and Eko takes a long dive off a large cliff.

P.S. The Lost interactive game began last night with a televised commercial for the Hanso Foundation. Was anyone able to get through? I've been calling and calling and haven't been able to get through yet. The number is 1-877-HANSORG.

UPDATE: The LOST-n-Found blog has a transcript of the phone messages(s) here, along with MP3 audio of the UK Hanso messages. And if you haven't gone through all the fun of the newly redesigned Hanso Foundation website, there's a helpful primer at Wikipedia. Scroll down to the relevant section and follow the helpful instructions. Namaste.

What's On Tonight

8 pm: Survivor: Panama--Exile Island (CBS); Will & Grace/Will & Grace (NBC); Smallville (WB); American Inventor (ABC); That '70s Show/That '70s Show (FOX); Everybody Hates Chris/Love, Inc. (UPN)

9 pm: CSI: Crime Scene Investigation (CBS); My Name is Earl/The Office (NBC); Supernatural (WB); American Inventor (ABC); The OC (FOX); Eve/Cuts (UPN)

10 pm: Without a Trace (CBS); ER (NBC); Primetime (ABC)

What I'll Be Watching

8 pm: Everybody Hates Chris.

That Chris can never ever catch a break, can he? On tonight's episode ("Everybody Hates Jail"), when Chris tries selling cookies to raise money for his school, he runs afoul of the police after claiming that he's selling stolen baked goods. Meanwhile, Chris' siblings aren't doing much better at home as Tanya and Drew catch chicken pox. And you can just bet that lil' Tanya is a royal pain in the butt.

9 pm: My Name is Earl.

Hmmm, another Earl episode with nothing but initials for a title ("BB"). While I was baffled by "Stole P's HD Cart" until a few minutes into the episode, I'm pretty sure I can get what "BB" stands for this time. On a new episode of Earl, our hero attempts to reunite a former crush with her father. And if any of the last 20-odd episodes have taught me anything, things exactly won't go according to plan.

9:30 pm: The Office.

On the penultimate Office episode of the season ("Conflict Resolution"), Michael usurps control of Dunder-Mifflin conflict resolution, yanking the responsibility away from his enemy Toby and the Human Resources department. As usual, complete chaos ensues.